It was last night's Meryl Streep chit-chat that got me to thinking; Hell, 15 nominations is impressive enough, and she's even won the dang Oscar twice! For Kramer vs. Kramer and Sophie's Choice. But while in the lovely land of Hollywood that's a track record to be amazingly proud of, the simple truth is that, in the land of baseball, Meryl Streep would be batting a lusty .133. I've seen American League pitchers who can bat .133!

And that silly thought led to the next logically silly one: If Meryl Streep is batting .133, who ELSE is batting poorly? And conversely ... who's leading the league? Now, I've got to limit eligibility to those who've been nominated at least three times, because otherwise we'd have Anna Paquin as Mickey Mantle. And I'm limiting this project to actors only, because that way one can squeeze another post or two out of this lame concept if people actually like it.

1.000* -- Hilary Swank (2 for 2); Kevin Spacey (2 for 2)
.500 -- Daniel Day-Lewis (2 for 4)
.400 -- Sean Penn (2 for 5); Tom Hanks (2 for 5); Denzel Washington (2 for 5);
.333 -- Maggie Smith (2 for 6); Tommy Lee Jones (1 for 3); Helen Mirren (1 for 3); Philip Seymour Hoffman (1 for 3); Marisa Tomei (1 for 3); Alan Arkin (1 for 3); Renee Zellweger (1 for 3); Kathy Bates (1 for 3); Geoffrey Rush (1 for 3); Julia Roberts (1 for 3); Russell Crowe (1 for 3)
.285 -- Michael Caine (2 for 7)
.250 -- Jack Nicholson (3 for 12); Julie Christie (1 for 4); Cate Blanchett (1 for 4); William Hurt (1 for 4); Frances McDormand (1 for 4); Morgan Freeman (1 for 4); Ben Kingsley (1 for 4); Diane Keaton (1 for 4); Holly Hunter (1 for 4); Jon Voight (1 for 4);

More after the jump
categories Awards, Cinematical