Welcome to Where Everyone Has Gone Before, the column in which I continue my film education before your very eyes by seeking out and watching all of the movies we all know I should have seen by now. I will first judge the movie before I've watched it, based entirely on its reputation (and my potentially misguided thoughts). Then I will give the movie a fair chance and actually watch it. You will laugh at me, you may condemn me, but you will never say I didn't try! And we all know what Yoda said about trying.

The Film: 'The Monster Squad' (1987), Dir. Fred Dekker

Starring: Andre Gower, Robby Kiger, Stephen Macht, Duncan Regehr and Tom Noonan.

Why I Haven't Seen It Until Now:
I've been burnt by 1980s movies far too many times. Nostalgia is a powerful beast, blinding even the most intelligent movie-watchers into thinking that absolute junk from their childhood is worth my time. There are smart, wonderful people out there who actually think 'The Goonies' is a good movie. 'The Monster Squad' has always felt like one of those movies. Honestly, I'm only writing about it because a bunch of people at a party made fun of me because I hadn't seen it. I am doing this to protect my honor. div class="classy">

Pre-Viewing Assumptions (Before I've watched the film):
Funny I mentioned 'The Goonies' above, because that's pretty much what 'The Monster Squad' is. It's 'The Goonies' with classic Universal monsters. So it's a lot of annoying kids screaming while going on an inane adventure to save the neighborhood and encountering the Wolfman and Dracula and Frankentsein's monster and learning a lot of valuable lessons. Of course the movie ends with the kids learning that the monsters aren't so bad and they all team up to take down an evil real estate developer. Of course.