This weekend marks the release of 'Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale' -- a Finnish film about an archeological team that unearths the real Santa Claus deep inside a mountain. It turns out, your childhood image of jolly old St. Nick couldn't be further from the truth; the actual Santa is a hulking beast of a monster, here to kidnap children. The team tries to cage him like an animal, but once his loyal elves try to break him free, a whole lot of havoc erupts.

The film has been hyped up for months on the internet (read Jason Murphy's review of the film when it played at Fantastic Fest), but the evil Santa is practically a Christmas classic, fitting in nicely with Rudolph and Ralphie. We thought it was time to honor the evil Santa and his laundry list of crimes.