This week, NASA discovered a planet in which they named Kepler-22b. (I hope the residents of Kepler-22b are OK with the fact that the new name of their home world sounds like it can also be used to slow the effects of male pattern baldness.) This planet is interesting! You see, Kepler-22b orbits around its closest star in an area known as the Goldilocks zone. In other words: water doesn't turn into a gas or a solid, just like Earth. To most of the scientific community, this seems to be very exciting news. To me, it's ominous. Unreasonable, you say? Hogwash. I know how this story ends. So, yeah, I'm on to you, Kepler-22b. Or should I call you ... Melancholia?