The good news first: Keith Richards totally rocks it playing pirate daddy to Johnny Depp's Capt. Jack Sparrow. The deep rumble of his voice and those hooded eyes that narrowly open like the creaky gates of hell make him what the rest of this three-peat is not: authentically scary...So what's the bad news? Richards is onscreen for barely two minutes. show more
Has no narrative throughline, no emotional spine. It's a mess. show more
The pirate ship has hit foul waters, and even the sharp wit and charm of everyone's favorite buccaneer can't save it. show more
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