Travel back with me, readers, to a time long ago. T'was late summer of 2001, and before there was Gigli, before there was Crossroads ... there was Glitter. Ah, Glitter - the rare film whose mere title makes the joke itself. Glitter's failure has not wiped its reason for being clear of Hollywood dreams. "Believe it or not," Mariah Carey told Liz Smith, "I want to do more [movies]." Carey reminds Smith that Glitter came out around September 11 - "Maybe it wouldn't have made a difference," she admits, "but I don't think it helped" - and also namechecks the other film she made around the same time, an indie called Wisegirls. Mariah claims Wisegirls "got great reviews", which is, uh, not exactly how I remember it. But sure, I've got faith in Mariah the Movie Star - I've seen Glitter, and it can't get any worse.