In what universe can a film fall off 50% from its first weekend to its second, and still make more money than every other film in release? And in what kind of summer movie season can a Michael Bay picture open in fourth place? The answer to both questions is, "Uh, this one, apparently".

Last week's number one film, Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, is going to end the weekend having made $28.3 million, almost exactly half of last week's gross. The Wedding Crashers, apparently this year's Dodgeball, rode good word-of-mouth to hold on to second place with a very respectable $26.2 million (that's a dropoff of just 23%). And, oh, look - even three-week-old Fantastic Four just barely edged out said Bay film, earning $12.3 million. The superstar-less clone-farm pic settled for fourth place with $12.1 million.

This disapointing gross was still the best of any of this week's four openers. Richard Linklater's Bad News Bears retread, which opened on 3,000+ screens, only scraped together $11.3 million. The week's two smaller releases, Rob Zombie's Devil's Rejects and Craig Brewer's Hustle and Flow, did respectable business ($7 million and $8.1 million, respectively) on something like 1,000 screens apiece.

The only real "success story" to report this weekend centers on March of the Penguins. The indie doc that could went a little bit wider and padded into the outer-most corner of the Top Ten.

What went wrong here? Are any kind of slump dialectics even applicable to this situation, or did Bay and Linklater's films fail on their own merits?

Full top ten after the jump.