steveYou heard it here first, Academy members:  if Angela ChaseClaire Danes isn't nominated for an Oscar for her work in Shopgirl, Steve Martin will end it all. Now, there are a couple of ways to deal with this threat. The first, of course, is to be a good person. Set up a snow chain-style calling tree to keep Steve alive. Take it upon yourself to make sure that every single voter you know checks the "Claire Danes" box on their nomination ballot. The second, deeply sinister option, is for the silent masses who think Steve Martin is the root of all evil. Simply use the same system to make sure that no one mentions Danes' name for the next four months - as far as you are concerned, the girl has ceased to exist. And, if this method is successful, so will Steve.*

*A possible problem with option two is that Martin made an identical threat regarding Eddie Murphy's performance in Bowfinger. So don't get your hopes up.