I'm Going to Tell You a Secret, the new Madonna documentary, is premiering on MTV tonight, and because Ryan and I are insane, we're going to stay home and chatcast it. The source of her recent crack-pot comments about the "evils of the material world", the film was directed by Jonas Åkerlund, the man behind last year's tweaker drama Spun. It begins, in the vein of the great Truth or Dare, as a tour documentary, and then procedes to follow Maddy to Israel as she embarks on her latest vainglorious spiritual quest. Check back here for our commentary tomorrow morning.