Madonna recently told the New York Daily Newsthat though she tried to find a distributor at last year's Cannes Film Festival for her recent documentary, I'm Going to Tell You a Secret, "unless you're Steven Spielberg, distributors take all your DVD rights." In order to learn her lesson, Madonna apparently had to get burned. "When I sold Truth or Dare to Miramax," she says, "I got very little out of it. Just to use a clip of it in my new movie, I had to pay them like $7,000." Mrs. Ritchie maintains that she was "thinking outside the box" when she eschewed a theatrical release to have the film shown exclusively on television. All this, despite the fact that she doesn't let her own kids watch TV? "Just because I'm a mother doesn't mean I'm not still a rebel and that I don't want to go in the face of convention and challenge the system," she says. "It's actually very punk-rock to not watch TV." So, to recap: Madonna's kids are punk rock, and anyone who subjected themselves to the two hours of Kabbalah-infused hell that his her new documentary is, apparently, not. And with that, I renounce my studded belt and Stranglers records to Rocco Ritchie, the future of the revolution.