So, apparently early testing of King Kong has reavealed that it's not doing that well with women. Wow. Shocking news, that. Rather than accepting the situation, however, Universal decided they were going to make women like this movie if it killed them. To that end, they've come out with a pair of newTV spots aimed specifically at the ladies. Scored with Coldplay (because, you know, chicks love that sappy British crap), dominated by pull quotes about tenderness and eternal love, and filled with longing looks, male tears, and a giant, fake monkey in love, they're nothing less than an insult to women everywhere. Good work, Universal! Wait - you mean that's not what you were going for?