Well, the big hullabaloo in town this week would have to be the Castro's premiere of The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things, based on the faux-moir by J. T. Leroy. For those of you who don't follow San Francisco's literary scene – which is probably all of you – The SF Chronicle had a nice piece about how drugged-up, ex-hustler, super-shy, HIV-positive author and celeb J. T. LeRoy turned out to be a big fat fraud. (And really, is HIV-positive status something that can be used as a character detail? That's, uh, not cool, as the kids say.) I haven't seen The Heart is Deceitful yet, because I know it's loaded with cross-dressing and drug use and sexual depravity and, like you, I go to the movies to escape from work.

If you're not feeling fraud-a-liscious, the San Francisco Asian American International Film Festival – whose acronym is two letters shy of being a James Bond '60s bad-guy group – is closing up in San Jose, including a screening of the witty and fun Red Doors. Ask Burt Bacharach for directions. The Red Vic has King Kong, in case you can't get enough of an expensive, sad-looking monkey; finally, The Clay has a midnight showing of, God help us, The Gooniesas part of their actually-quite-good Midnight Movie series. Remember folks: The Goonies is just a gateway film; soon, you'll be watching Explorers.

See you around the Bay,