Odds and ends from Monday:
- Hey, what do you know -- a story about Johnny Depp that isn't pirate-related. (Does that mean I can't call him Captain Jack? Nah.) Captain Jack's production company has tapped director Terry Zwigoff (Bad Santa) to helm Happy Days (no relation to the popular TV show), based off the French novel. Zwigoff will also co-write the script along with Jerry Stahl, with Depp's Infinitum Nihil and Graham King's Initial Entertainment Group producing. Story revolves around a man who leaves his wife and children in order to check himself into a rest home. However, while there, he forges a special bond with a terminal cancer patient and ultimately helps to fulfill her last wish.
- Here's one way to get people to go see your movie -- just compare it to The Da Vinci Code. P.J. Hogan has signed on to directChasing Vermeer, based off the best-selling children's novel which is said to be like The Da Vinci Code, but for tweens. Having never read Chasing Vermeer, I cannot say how similar the two are. But I can tell you the story centers around two sixth-graders who attempt to solve the mystery behind a stolen Johannes Vermeer painting. Last I checked, the Catholic Church had nothing against sixth-graders, right?
- So, it turns out those rumors about Gwyneth Paltrow teaming back up with the Farrellybrothers were completely false. Oh well, I couldn't see her playing a bride from hell anyway. She's way too sweet. Ya know, like an apple. Instead, Peter and Bobby Farrelly have signed newcomer Malin Akerman to star alongside Ben Stiller and Michelle Monaghan in Seven Day Itch. Not much is known about Akerman, except that she's best known for her role in Lisa Kudrow's horrific HBO show The Comeback. Yes, it was horrific. And if she somehow wins the Emmy, I will officially ban TV in my apartment forever.