Just a few days ago the lovely Jessica Barnes informed us that there was a new poster afoot for the upcoming werewolf movie Blood & Chocolate, and now here I am sharing with you the all-new trailer for the flick ... and it ain't pretty. Oh sure, leading lady Agnes Bruckner is all kinds of attractive, but based on this trailer, Blood & Chocolate looks a lot like a Uwe Boll flick mixed with a supernatural teenybopper TV series that Fox hyped, debuted and canceled over the course of three full weeks.

Equal parts Underworld, The Craft and Beverly Cleary, Blood & Chocolate comes from German filmmaker Katja von Garnier, whose last two films were a period piece about the women's suffragate movement and a drama about a bunch of imprisoned rockers who bust outta jail in search of stardom. So obviously she's just the person to helm Underworld Kinda: The Teenage Years. For those still holding out hope that I'm a clueless dolt who knows nothing, I'll let you know that B&C was written by the guy who penned The Brothers Grimm and The Skeleton Key. And The Ring 2. And Impostor, Reindeer Games and Scream 3. Yeah, that guy.

In related news, "Blood & Chocolate" has already won the award for 2007's Stupidest Movie Title of the Year. I just now made up the award and gave it out at the same time. (Yes, I know the movie is based on a book, but that doesn't magically make the title any less stupid.) Attention bored teenagers: Blood & Chocolate opens on January 26. Your other multiplex options that night will be Jennifer Garner, yet another remake or something to make your eyes bleed. Yowch, rough weekend.
categories Movies, Cinematical