Well, it was an interesting night, not watching the Globes here on the West Coast. Thanks to Ryan and Erik at the NYC end, and Ryan Seacrest and the rest of the E! gang on my TV, it was almost like being there, only with less hairspray fumes. Thanks to Jen Yamato from Rotten Tomatoes for commiserating with me.

No huge surprises tonight. It was nice that Murphy got a Golden Globe for Supporting Actor -- will that boost his Oscar odds? I was glad enough to see Forest Whitaker snag Best Actor in a Drama, and also to see Sacha Boren Cohen get recognized for Borat. Helen Mirren's win was predictable -- I loved her in The Queen, but still would have preferred to see Kate Winslet score this one. But Mirren has a pretty solid lock on the Oscar at this point, it seems.

Best Line of the Night: John Stamos to Ryan Seacrest: "Are you coming onto me?"

Grossest Display of Red Carpet Booty-Smacking: Seacrest, hands down, for his constant drooling over blond actresses. I think he wishes he had arms as buff as Jessica Biel's.

Best Use of Boobage on the Red Carpet: Beyonce, whose glittery, slicked-up display looked like her cleavage was the one up for an award.

Best Use of Bra: Drew Barrymore, who remembered to wear one this year.

The "We Don't Want to Be Here" Award: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie looked like they wanted desperately to escape, but was it Ryan's clutches they wanted out of, or the evening altogether? You'd think they'd like a night away from all the diaper changes, eh? Nonetheless, they officially rival Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith for Best-Dressed Couple.

Worst Post-Breakup Look: What the hell was Cameron Diaz wearing? She looked like a pink, poufy, Victorian hat or something.

Best Post-Breakup Look: Reese Witherspoon, y'all! The haircut's a little young and choppy, but what the hell? She looked gorgeous, and I sincerely hope Ryan Phillipe has joined Ethan Hawke's "Men Who Shouldn't Have Screwed Up" Club.

The real awards, after the jump ...