These bites are more pulpy than usual, but every once in a while, we need something to smirk at:
- Some of you might squeal at the mention of Albert Pyun, but I didn't myself until I realized that he's the man who brought us the fan-freaking-tastic Cyborg. You remember that Van Damme flick, right? An apolocalyptic wasteland, a villain with creepy eyes and a tortured hero who was crucified and tormented with memories of a little girl, a well and some sharp, barbed wire. The latter still makes me twitch. Anyway, while I can't say that I love Pyun's work since then, he's got another film on the horizon -- Left for Dead -- an "amped up spaghetti western / horror fever dream. El Topo meets NC-17 horror madness." You can find stills here, and don't they look quite reminiscent of Cyborg? The women even look similar!
- Christie Boner -a.k.a.- the original Buffy, Kristy Swanson could be heading to television to take on the role of none other than recently-deceased Anna Nicole Smith. Fox News reports that sources are buzzing about a fictionalized version of Smith's life for Law & Order: Criminal Intent. Swanson, who recently made waves for her romance and child out-of-wedlock with still married father of two, Lloyd Eisler, should have the scandal part down-pat, and she's got a pretty good resemblance going (look to the right). Reports also say that Jon Lovitz might take on the part of Howard K. Stern, but Larry Birkhead will remain out of the story. With a television treatment out of the way, I'm sure we'll have feature film news in no time!
- Finally, it's a good thing Angelina Jolie has fame and money, otherwise, I don't know how she would handle her relationship, family, acting and global work! The kid-lover, who already has Maddox, Zahara and Shiloh, is speeding through an adoption for her fourth, a three-and-a-half-year-old Vietnamese son. It could be as little as a few weeks before Jolie whisks him away from the orphanage he's lived in since he was a baby. Why is this news worthy? Well, besides the fact that she's almost half-way to a Baseball team, I wonder how long it will be before we get a Jolie family movie, perhaps written just for her and her ever-growing number of children? Sound of Music for the new millennium, perhaps?