A few months back Cinematical heard a few murmurs that Fox's Live Free or Die Hard might (might!) be angling for a PG-13 rating, but the Fox publicity department informed our contact that there was "no story here," which is a phrase that could be taken numerous ways. (Those crafty publicists!) Now we hear from Bruce Willis (in a Vanity Fair magazine article, as quoted by AICN) that, yep, the studio very well could (could!) be moving forward with the PG-13 plan.

Now, I'm not going to unravel and fly off on a nerdly tangent (kinda like AICN's Vern did, albeit very entertainingly), but good lord is this a bad idea! Turning a well-established "hard R" action series into something a little cuddlier for the teenage crowd -- pure silliness. The target audience for Die Hard 4 is ... me: A thirty-(koff)-year-old movie nerd who saw all three of the Die Hard flicks during their original theatrical run and is more than enthusiastically prepared to re-welcome John McClane back to the multiplexes. I'm the guy who made your series such a smash, Fox people, and if you decide to trim the flick down, edit out the intensity, soften the blows, and neuter the flick for fifteen-year-olds who'll always see ANY movie they want, regardless of MPAA rating ... I simply won't go see it. And this is coming from a guy who was excited to see Perfect freakin' Stranger because Bruce Willis was in it.

I'm guessing someone at Fox will come to their senses sooner or later. I mean really: Not every damn summer flick has to be tailor-made for the teenagers. I love the kids and all, but isn't 89% of the Hollywood fare made for them in the first place? (97% in the summer.) Can't us semi-grown-up action freaks have at least one movie this summer? Then again, Return of the King was also PG-13, and I don't hear anyone whining about how weak those action scenes were ... No! No, I must stop trying to see the other side of the argument! No PG-13 Die Hard movies! That wretched PG-13 monster already ruined my beloved horror genre! It can't get John McClane too!
categories Cinematical