"Old-fashioned" would be a good way to describe the tastily vanilla-flavored The Last Legion. Packed as it is (to the rafters) with equal parts cliché, convention, stereotype and plain old predictability, the movie could also be described as campy, corny, goofy, and all sorts of painfully familiar. "Boring," however, it is not. Hearkening back to the days in which a new sword-swingin' matinee was available every weekend, the international co-production certainly doesn't tread any new ground -- and it's even quite silly in some spots -- but that doesn't stop it from delivering some good fun. (Who cares if some of that fun is of the "unintentional" variety? That makes it even more fun!)
Sort of a loose prequel to the King Arthur legend, The Last Legion focuses on a young Roman emperor who is kidnapped by an evil warlord and sent to an island fortress with his wizened old teacher, only to be rescued by a super-heroic warrior and a gang of colorful sidekicks -- one of whom is a stunningly beautiful (and amazingly deadly) woman. Toss in a few obvious-yet-kinetic action scenes, a whole bunch of floridly storybook-ish tendencies, and just enough colorful characters to keep the thing afloat, and you've got a perfectly watchable time-waster ... once it shows up on cable / DVD, that is.