After the last Polonia brothers movie I watched (the dreadful Splatter Farm which I reviewed here), I couldn't imagine wanting to see more of their work. Camp Motion Pictures will be inflicting Splatter Beach upon the public as a two-disk set on October 9, and when the review copy arrived in the mail I felt compelled to give it a spin. It's been about twenty years since Splatter Farm, and as awful as that movie was I was curious to see how far John and Mark Polonia have come as film makers. And I must admit the presence of actress Erin Brown, better known as softcore film star Misty Mundae was also a deciding factor. What can I say; she's easy on the eyes. I'm a little confused about Ms. Brown's reason for using a second name. If she's attempting to keep films like this one separate from her other body of work (she remains fully clothed throughout the film), why does it specifically say on the box cover that she is also known as Misty Mundae?
Things get off to a promising start when a shambling sea creature makes its way out of Lake Erie and attacks a gratuitously showering victim. The creature is fairly cheap looking, but the seams in the costume are kept hidden by using a lot of quick cuts. Things start going downhill once the plot begins to kick in. People are disappearing at a rate of six per month, and Rupert (David Fife) the journalism student is sure he's going to get the story of a lifetime. His annoying buddy Rodney (Brice Kennedy) -- a thirty-ish white guy trying to sound like a rapper -- and Rodney's girlfriend Tonya (Erika Smith) have rented a seaside house near the ominously named Splatter Beach.