It would be one thing if You Don't Mess With the Zohan was simply bad; after the recent string of Adam Sandler comedies like I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Click and The Longest Yard, You Don't Mess With the Zohan continues the Sandler career path where low comedy is intended to result in high profits. Sandler's films now seem to function mostly as a kind of philosophical experiment: How lazy, sloppy and stupid can a film be and still make money? And let's not mince words here, or hem and haw and add caveats about a few laughs or good intentions: You Don't Mess With the Zohan is astonishingly, impressively, depressingly bad.
And no, this is not some sneering, soft-handed ivory-tower resident looking down on Sandler's work from a lofty height; this is someone who loves a good smart dumb comedy telling you that if you see You Don't Mess With the Zohan, you'll witness a moment where Zohan -- the Israeli commando-turned-hairdresser played by Sandler -- wishes a sad farewell to someone with his junk. We get a close-up of it -- bulging, frame-filling -- and it waggles a little wave to us, sadly, as Zohan wishes goodbye to a girl he might have loved, eyes sad and crotch engorged.