Oscars 2009Every year, it's the same old story: the Academy Awards are out of touch with "the people." The Academy Awards TV show must be changed. The ratings are down! The sky is falling! Every year, the Academy swears this year will be different: the broadcast will be less than seven hours, it'll be relevant, it won't be boring. Every year they fail.

The New York Times on Sunday reported that host Hugh Jackman will "sign off the broadcast with fresh 10-second snippets of two dozen new movies, to run on a split screen with the end credits." To which I say: Academy, are you really that insanely stupid? Or do you really think we, the audience, are that stupid?

I have great respect for the craftspeople working behind the scenes, but nobody stays to watch the bloody end credits! By that point, it's always way past midnight on the East Coast, and people have gone to bed because, you know, the rest of us have to get up in the morning and go to work. Who cares about 10-second snippets? That's insulting.

Monika wrote this afternoon about more unindentified "risks" that the show will be taking, with "big surprises" in store for "cinematographers, editors, composers." (Notice, no "actors" mentioned there.) Well, if the Academy really wants to be 'risky" and change things up, all they need to do is cast a look at the most-watched TV broadcast of the year: the Super Bowl. Year after year, the Super Bowl attracts viewers who never watch football, people who don't even know who's playing, and wouldn't know an Arizona Cardinal from a Pittsburgh Steeler if they encountered one in full uniform at the local supermarket. How do they do it?

After the jump: four ways to make the Academy Awards more like the Super Bowl.

categories Awards, Cinematical