The rights to the Terminator franchise have only been up on the auction block for about as long as it takes Arnold Schwarzenegger to emerge naked from a time bubble, but a veteran Hollywood mogul has already expressed interest in taking the brand off the hands of the now-bankrupt Halcyon; and that vet is none other than Toy Story, Alien: Resurrection, and Titan A.E. screenwriter Joss Whedon (oh, and he created Buffy the Vampire Slayer and "Firefly"/Serenity, but I don't think anyone has ever heard of those).

Mr. Whedon took the time out of his busy schedule running his latest TV show, the Eliza Dushku starring "Dollhouse", to write an earnest letter to Halcyon making the case for why he's the right man for the job. And as with all things Whedon, his proposal has its fair share of the funny.

In it, he outlines the six possible directions he'd take the franchise, which range from simply adding more Summer Glau ("There's a reason they're called "Summer" movies.") to sending a Terminator to Middle Earth ("because he's a cyborg and he doesn't give a s#&% about the ring -- it has no power over him! And he can carry it AND Frodo AND Sam AND f@%& up some orcs while he's doing it. This stuff just comes to me. I mean it.").

Now his opening bid of $10,000 may be a smidge lower than the estimated $200,000 Halcyon is asking for the rights, but with a formal business plan as detailed as Whedon's, I'd be flabbergasted if they turned it down. Read on to check out the full letter, which may or may not contain similar offers to also buy Batman and Lord of the Rings.
categories Cinematical