Poor Jessica ... not only is she forced to deal with a deranged stalker, but it's one who feels the need to use constant Star Wars references in his love letters. I have no idea where this came from or whether it's actually real, but it popped up over at the worst thing tumblr and it's apparently some sort of lame love letter from a kid who uses awkward and unsettling Star Wars references in a last ditch effort to win some girl's heart. Problem is he's not winning anyone over with lines like, "I want to crawl up inside you. Like Luke Skywalker crawled up inside his tauntaun to protect himself from the sub-zero temperatures of Hoth, where the Rebel Alliance was hiding from the Galactic Empire."

Yeah, because girls really like it when you compare them to the nasty insides of a deceased fictional snow creature thingy. Perhaps commenter FungusUmungus said it best when he (or she) noted: "Luke didn't crawl inside his TaunTaun, Han Solo put him in it. No wonder Jessica hates you." Indeed.

Read the full letter by clicking the image below.

categories Sci-Fi