Perhaps I should have been a lawyer because when I was just 14-years-old, I managed to convince my mother to let me drive her convertible to lunch, roughly a four-mile trip. Despite never having been behind the wheel, I did quite well until hitting the service road. When you let a kid without a permit drive with the top down at 50 mph, a gigantic trunk honking its horn at you while it tries to change lanes only results in one thing: screaming. My mother screamed at the top of her lungs and I panicked until we finally reached a red light and could do a quick Chinese fire drill. The first thing I thought when it was all over? At least Dionne (Stacey Dash) knows how I feel. Clueless is packed with scenes worthy of a mention in this column, but it's Dionne's driving calamity that's getting the honor today.
Unlike my ride, Dionne's doesn't even start out particularly successful. Her boyfriend Murray (Donald Faison) tells her to get into her right lane and asks her what's the first thing she should do. She gets the first part right and explains she must put on her blinker, but instead of igniting the turn signal, she turns on her wipers. Making matters worse, while trying to figure out how to turn them off, she takes her eyes completely off the road. Things come crashing down when Dionne decides to check her blind spot and does so by not only turning her head, but the car as well.