Warning: Spoilers ahead, not only from the "Game of Thrones" Season 5 finale but also the "A Song of Ice and Fire" books.
Don't worry! Jon Snow ("Game of Thrones" Season 5 finale -- Episode 10, "Mother's Mercy" -- had so many deaths it may literally be impossible to count, unless someone has a definitive number on Stannis Baratheon's men. But the name of the book series is "A Song of Ice and Fire" and Jon Snow is the Ice as much as Daenerys Targaryen is the Fire. His watch has not ended.
Here are the deaths we're sure about:
• Selyse Baratheon
• Stannis Baratheon (and the men who didn't ditch him)
• Meryn Trant
• Myrcella Baratheon (we think we're 100 percent about this one. She was poisoned but we didn't see her die)
Here are the less certain deaths:
• Jaqen died but did not die because No One died. Let someone else explain it. He's fine. And yet he killed himself. Don't worry about it.
• Jon Snow. He was stabbed repeatedly by his fellow men of the Night's Watch, who consider him a traitor. Even young Olly, Jon's little protege, joined the stabbing. He was the last knife into Jon's body and Season 5 ended with Jon bleeding out, looking dead. In the most recent book, "A Dance with Dragons," the same thing happened, but Jon called to Ghost -- suggesting that maybe Jon would warg into Ghost. If Jon does die, or comes close, can Melisandre save him -- she who is essentially useless on all other levels at this point?
A crapload of other stuff happened outside of the deaths: Arya is now blind, Cersei had a naked walk of shame, Sam left for The Citadel, Sansa and Theon escaped, Dany is back with a khalasar, Varys returned, etc.
Here are highlights from Episode 10:
• We had the first death within the first five minutes of the episode when Stannis Baratheon was led into the woods to find his wife, Selyse Baratheon had hanged herself. We'd feel worse about it if she hadn't been such a horrible mother up until the point when her daughter was already burning and it was too late to do anything. Stannis also faced a mutiny of men who apparently didn't want to follow a king who was willing to burn his daughter alive. Didn't see that in your flames, did you, Melisandre?
• Stannis continued his sad trombone luck/bad betting on Mel's prophecies, when an army went out to meet him in the field outside Winterfell. They were vastly outnumbered. So the Boltons won, again.
• Brienne of Tarth came upon the wounded Stannis and sentenced him to death. Stannis' last words: "Go on, do your duty." Second death of the episode: Stannis. Unless you count all the men with him. What's Melisandre going to do now? Will she accept that she was wrong or continue her delusions?
• Sansa watched the battle play out, then worked to make her escape. She was stopped by Myranda with her bow and arrow, next to Theon. While Myranda was threatening Sansa, and about to shoot, Theon pushed Myranda over a ledge and killed her. (When does Sansa get to save herself?) He and Sansa went to escape.
• Sam decided he would serve best as a maester, requesting to be sent to The Citadel, which would also be safest for Gilly. So Jon lost his only friend and was alone as the self-described most hated man in Castle Black.
• Meryn Trant beat the girls around him, until Arya was revealed as one of them -- she had used one of the faces. She gave it right back to him and then some. Will anyone mourn this pedophile sadist? No. Arya told him she was the first name on her list. Now he's no one. Nothing. His death was gruesome.
• As expected, Jaqen H'ghar was not happy that Arya took a life -- the wrong life. She was deemed, as the other girl said, not ready. She stole from The Many Faced God and now a debt is owed. Only death can pay for life. So Jaqen killed himself. Sort of. He killed No One, and Arya ripped off face after face. Jaqen was still there as someone else, but Arya was made blind -- as in the book. Hopefully it will be temporary, as in the book, but they keep twisting things. At the very least, she'll be blind into Season 6 as part of her punishment.
• While sailing from Dorne to King's Landing, Jaime tried to tell Myrcella the truth about her father. She already knew. And she was glad. (Gross) However, that was followed by Myrcella having a runny nose -- she was poisoned by the Sand Snakes. Ellaria drank the antidote, but Myrcella didn't get any. Uh oh. Another death?
• Over in Meereen, Grey Worm finally got up for a chat with Dany's boys -- Jorah, Tyrion, and Daario -- along with Missandei. There was a great deal of debate about what to do and how to find Dany. Tyrion was left behind as the guys went looking for Dany, but you know who returned? Varys! He's back to plotting and spying with Tyrion.
• Dany and Drogon were seen out in the grasslands in the middle of nowhere. Dany tried to argue with Drogon that they had to return to Meereen because her people need her, but he did not seem to agree. Or he didn't understand her, 'cause he's a dragon. While out in the grass, she was surrounded by a huge khalasar, similar to in "A Dance with Dragons." She dropped one of her jewels to place her there, in case anyone's looking for her. (Helpful.)
• Cersei was encouraged to confess and, this time, she was ready -- even if she wasn't sincere about it. She went to the High Sparrow and asked for absolution. He said she could go home ... after her atonement. She was scrubbed naked, had her hair shorn, and forced to go for her "walk of atonement," aka walk of shame -- with a women literally calling out "shame" as she walked. That was soon drowned out by "whore," "c-nt," and other insults from the people of King's Landing, which is straight from the book. (Hearing a version of Rains of Castamere just makes it more poignant.) Can Ramsay get this treatment someday?
• After Cersei was done her walk of shame, Qyburn introduced her to the newest member of the Kingsguard: Ser Robert Strong, aka The Mountain reborn.
• Up at The Wall, Davos was arguing for men of the Watch to help Stannis. Melisandre returned and when Davos and Jon Snow asked for news on Stannis, Shireen, etc., she just stared at them. They should ... not burn her, 'cause she'd like that, but do something. Another walk of atonement.
• Olly came into Jon's study and said there was a man who said he knew his uncle Benjen, saying he was alive. It was a trap. Jon was taken to a sign that read "traitor." Ser Alliser stabbed him. "For the Watch." Other men joined in, also "For the Watch." Olly was the last to approach Jon. He who killed Ygritte last season. He tearfully stabbed Jon. "For the Watch." Eh tu, traitor?
So now our Does Jon Really Die?! watch begins and shall not end until "Game of Thrones" Season 6 - or at least until "The Winds of Winter" novel is released. Which will come first?
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