Memorable Quotes from Glenn Shadix
2 quotesFaith and Guidance in Troubled Times
Father Ripper
We must pray the other teenagers of Sherwood, Ohio know the name of that righteous dude who can solve their problems: it's ] Christ, and he's in the book.
[[Jesus]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Innovative Self-Heating TV Dinner Concept Introduced
Edison
Ladies and gentlemen, when I was yo high, I got the idea for making something everyone could use, and today, it is a reality. So, without further ado... Ta-da! The device that's gonna rock the world!
[removes the cover off the Chef Edison's TV Dinner]
Fremont
A TV dinner? I hate to break the news, but Swanson beat you to the punch by 40 years.
Edison
Guys, it's not just a TV dinner, it's a real TV dinner. Here, check it out. The hardest part was making a TV that could withstand going from the freezer to be heated.
[opens the lid to the TV dinner, showing the food tray and a portable TV screen, much to the hoard's amusement; passes the TV dinner to Natalie, who passes it down to every board member all the way to Landers]
Larry
This dinner is self-heating and uses microwave technology to cook the food and run the TV for 4 hours.
Edison
And here's the kicker, it only costs $2.19 more than a regular TV dinner.
Fremont
Ingenious!
Landers
And tasty, too.
Bradford
Get him a bib.
Edison
I say we go into immediate production.
Natalie
Whoa, Edison. I don't mean to burst your bubble, but there are standard procedure to follow. We have product testing and focus groups, safety regulations. We can't just march right into production.
Edison
Well, you've done this a lot longer than I have, so...
Bradford
Hold on! Didn't you just tell us that this is the greatest thing since individually wrapped cheese slices?
[interrupting]
Edison
I would never, ever dare compare it to individually wrapped cheese slices. I mean, come on. We all know there's nothing better or tastier than that. Bradford, hello? Scrumpdillyicious, cheese slices. Although, I would say this is close.
Natalie
Yes, but...
Bradford
Natalie, please. Gentlemen, months of costly testing will only tell us what we already know. The product works, but, of course, it's up to you, Mr. Chairman of the Board.
Edison
I say we go into production now!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.