Spooks Run Wild - The Complexity of Milking a Cow
Glimpy:
You know, I milked a cow once. A very intricate affair. You see, a cow's got four faucets.
Danny:
What for?
Glimpy:
Well, the first faucet is for buttermilk, the second for bottled milk, and the third is for evaporated milk.
Danny:
What's the fourth one for?
Glimpy:
Come to think of it, this cow only had t'ree.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Spooks Run Wild - Reading in the Dark Explained
Danny:
How can you read in the dark?
Glimpy:
What'd you say?
Danny:
I said how can you read in the dark?
Glimpy:
I went to night school.
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Spooks Run Wild - Discussion of a Mysterious Ghoul
Muggs:
What're you looking for?
Danny:
Remember what we heard on the radio about that... that, that ghoul, that guy that sucks all the blood out of ya?
Muggs:
What would he be doin out here, suckin the sap out of the trees?
Glimpy:
Hey, does the guy really suck all the blood out of ya?
Danny:
Yeah!
Glimpy:
Well, I got nothin to worry about, cause the mosquitoes got all mine. Ow!
Glimpy:
That was a Messerschmitt.
Danny:
Hey, what if he really was out here?
Muggs:
What if you was back home?
Danny:
Yeah?
Muggs:
Your old man ould give you a hit in the head like dat.
Danny:
I ain't got an old man.
Glimpy:
The kid's an orphan.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Spooks Run Wild - Warning About The Monster Killer
Radio Announcer:
We interrupt this program for an important announcement to listeners near Hillside and Colton: All citizens are warned to be on the lookout for The Monster Killer, who is believed to be in this vicinity. This maniac has left a trail of three inhuman murders, and is believed heading upstate. We return you now to your program.
Muggs:
Monsters? That don't mean nothing to us. We eat em every morning for breakfast.
Glimpy:
Bring those monsters on. I ain't ascared of them. I'm anemic. I was taken for a ride once.
Margie:
You were?
Glimpy: [makes machine gun noises]
Yeah. There I was, miles from Time Square - somewhere in Central Park I think - and them gangsters, they had me backed against a tree, and they got machine guns, see, and they went... And what do you think happened?
Margie:
I don't know. What happened?
Muggs and Danny:
He got killed.
Glimpy:
Fantastic, wasn't it?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Misunderstanding Leads to Uncovering Disturbing Secrets
Mugs: [to Jack]
We was decoratin that house.
Glimpy:
Yeah, we thought it was yours.
Mugs:
We found a printin press with a lot of Nazi propaganda.
Glimpy:
Yeah, we thought it was yours.
Mugs:
So, we moved it over here.
Glimpy:
Yeah, then we found out that was yours.
Mugs:
So, we moved it back again.
Jack:
Nazi propaganda?
Mugs:
Sure!
Jack:
So, that's why they didn't want us to come out here. Why didn't you call the police?
Glimpy:
We thought it was yours!
Jack:
Is there a phone next door?
Mugs:
Yeah, but that ain't yours.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Diploma and Diplomacy in Conversation
Mugs:
Why don't you use some diplomacy?
Glimpy:
I got my diploma. I graduated from school.
Mugs:
What did you graduate? Kindergarten?
Glimpy:
Oh, I skipped Kindergarten. I was too old.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Discussion on House Choices and Gardens
Mugs:
Wow, this is really nice! Lamps, drapes, books, everything. I wonder why he bought that old house next door instead of this one?
Glimpy:
I guess there wasn't enough room in the yard for a Victory Garden.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Unexpected Disappearance of a Printing Press
Mugs:
Well, can you picture dat? I must be havin optical delusions.
Lieutenant:
What's the matter?
Mugs:
Well, there was a printin press here ten minutes ago.
Lieutenant:
Ah, just got up and walked away, eh?
Glimpy:
Well, if ink can run, I guess a printing press can walk.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Misunderstanding Between Friends About Decor
Mugs:
You really think the place looks pretty nice, huh?
Jack:
Oh, it's fine, Mugs.
Glimpy:
Yeah. It could look better with some of them pictures on the wall, those, uh, paintings, those moralls.
Mugs:
Not moralls, morales!
Jack:
Look, uh, you guys mean, uh, murals?
Mugs:
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. He threw me off, you know. He's dumb sometimes.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Unexpected Consequences of Choices in Humor
Jack: [dejected, sitting on a coach next to Betty, in a quarantined room, surrounded by the East Side Kids]
What a honeymoon.
Mugs: [to Glimpy]
Y'always gotta do everything the hard way. Everybody else gets plain, ordinary, common measles. So, you gotta go out and dig up German measles.
Glimpy:
Who are you pickin on me for? Did I know dem guys were Nazis?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Ghosts on the Loose - Glimpy's Passion for Singing in Quartets
Glimpy:
Hey, Mugs, why can't I sing in dat quartet? I used to sing in a quartet wit six members. I can sing those fortissimos aloud too.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.