The Devil's Rejects - Morning Conversations About Chickens
Charlie Altamont:
Oh...yeah! Lord have mercy!! What a mornin'!! Clevon!!
Clevon:
Yeah boss?
Charlie Altamont:
You know why I come here to get these chickens?
Clevon:
No boss.
Charlie Altamont:
Cuz my brother makes the best fried chicken in the world!
Clevon:
Is that right?
Charlie Altamont:
(to Darrell) Yeah, good mornin good mornin good mornin good mornin sir! How are ya!
Darrell:
How're you all doin? G'morning.
Charlie Altamont:
Good, good, good, whatcha got for me?
Darrell:
We got these, uh, real cute barred rock chickens.
Charlie Altamont:
Yeah! I see it!
Darrell:
Some nice, long-legged Rhode Island Reds.
Charlie Altamont:
RHODE ISLAND RED!! I like that, huh! I want a Rhode Island red for me, all right? Two of em.
Darrell:
Rhode Island Red...two. (long pause, scratches his nose) Now ya'll ain't planning on fuckin these chickens are ya?
Charlie Altamont:
(after a long pause) What the fuck are you getting at? Do you fuck chickens?
Darrell:
Well, I thought about fuckin some chickens before, eh? If you want to have a good time and you need some pussy, you can (motions with his hands) cut that chicken's head off, stick yo dick in the ass of that chicken, and that damn chicken'll go crazy on your ass and go "Caaaaah".
Charlie Altamont:
Are you saying that I would cut off a chicken's head, put my dick in it, fuck it...and go "Aah"? You accuse me of fucking a chicken, motherfucker?
Darrell:
Nah, I ain't--I ain't callin you a chicken fucker but...that boy over there looks se--sexually frustrated, and I don't approve of chicken fucking.
Clevon:
Did you hear what he called me, Boss? I ain't--he called me a fucking chicken fucker!
Darrell:
I didn't say--
Charlie Altamont:
Everybody just stop yappin and grab the fuckin chickens, Clevon! (to Darrell) Here, five.
Darrell:
Appreciate it...thank y'all.
Clevon:
Chickenf--He's the chicken fucker!!!
Charlie Altamont:
That's all right. Put em back there. Next time we go someplace else.
Clevon:
We ain't never buying chickens from him again, boss!
Charlie Altamont:
Yeah, I know, I know.
Clevon:
(yelling back to Darrell, and giving the finger) You inbred! Inbred!!
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