Paul SchneiderQuotes

Hollie Baylor: We were complete opposites and it worked. And something happened between us that was not part of the plan... we were in love.

Jessie Baylor: [[Abraham Lincoln; [w:Ronnie Van Zandt|Ronnie Van Zandt] I teach my kids about the things that really matter. I will teach them about ] and ], because they are equally important in my house.

Dagmar: Have there been any changes in the family in the last year or so?

Gus: [while Karin simultaneously nods "Yes"] No, everything is pretty much exactly the same except Karin is pregnant and Lars is nuts.

Dagmar: You know, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. What we call mental illness isn't always just an illness. It can be a communication; it can be a way to work something out.

Gus: Fantastic. When will it be over?

Dagmar: When he doesn't need it anymore.

Karin: How can we help?

Dagmar: Go along with it.

Karin: Oh, no. No, that's... No.

Gus: Oh, my. No, no, no. No. No, I mean, pretend that she's real? I'm not gonna do that. I mean, I can't. I'm just not gonna do it.

Dagmar: She is real.

Gus: Well...

Dagmar: She's right out there.

Gus: Right, right, I get that, but I'm just not gonna, you know...

Dagmar: You won't be able to change his mind, anyway. Bianca's in town for a reason.

Gus: But - but...

Dagmar: It's not really a choice.

Karin: Okay. Okay, all right, we'll do it, whatever it takes.

Gus: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And everyone's gonna laugh at him.

Dagmar: And you.

Gus: What are we doing? Why are we doing this for him?

Karin: Oh, come on. It's funny!

Gus: Is it?

Karin: I don't know. I don't know, maybe not.

Lars: I was talking to Bianca, and she was saying that in her culture they have these rites of passages and rituals and ceremonies, and just all kinds of things that, when you do them, go through them, let you know that you're an adult. Doesn't that sound great?

Gus: It does.

Lars: How'd you know?

Gus: How'd I know what?

Lars: That you were a man.

Gus: Ahhh. I couldn't tell ya.

Lars: Was it... Okay, was it sex?

Gus: Um. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's uh, yeah, yeah it's kind of— it's, uh— No. Well, it's kind of sex but it's not, uh, you know? I don't know. I don't know. It's— uh... good question, good question.

Lars: Yeah, but I have to know.

Gus: [the dryer buzzes; goes into the basement, Lars follows] Hold that thought. You know, you should ask Dagmar.

Lars: I did ask Dagmar. And she said that I should ask you.

Gus: Okay, you know I can only give you my opinion.

Lars: That's what we want.

Gus: Well, it's not like you're one thing or the other, okay? There's still a kid inside but you grow up when you decide to do right, okay, and not what's right for you, what's right for everybody, even when it hurts.

Lars: Okay, like what?

Gus: Like, you know, like, you don't jerk people around, you know, and you don't cheat on your woman, and you take care of your family, you know, and you admit when you're wrong, or you try to, anyways. That's all I can think of, you know. It sounds like it's easy and for some reason it's not.

Ed Miller: I was with a girl once. Wasn't a squaw, but she was purty. She had yellow hair, like uh... oh, like something.

Dick Liddil: Like hair bobbed from a ray of sunlight?

Ed Miller: Yeah, yeah. Like that. Boy, you talk good.

Dick Liddil: You can hide things in vocabulary.

Ed Miller: Maybe you and me could write her a note, send it by post?

Dick Liddil: See, all you gotta do, Ed, is predict her needs and beat her to the punch.

Ed Miller: Well, this girl, she had a real specific job.

Dick Liddil: Specific?

Ed Miller: We's only together once. She's afraid of lightning. She came up into the wagon and just cuddled right up to me. She gave me a kind price, too.

Dick Liddil: Well I'll be! That is specific.

Ed Miller: Yeah, sure, she been with other people. But the kinds of things she said to me, people just don't say unless they really mean it.

Dick Liddil: [[Catullus|My love said she would marry only me, and Jove himself could not make her care, for what women say to lovers, you'll agree, one writes on running water, or on air.] ]

Ed Miller: My God that's good. Let's write her that.

Dick Liddil: Naw. Poetry don't work on whores.