Chicago (2003) - Quotes

Life as a Show: The Circus of Trials

Billy Flynn: It's all a circus, kid. A three ring circus. These trials - the whole world - all showbusiness. But kid, you're working with a star - the biggest!

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The Art of Showmanship

Billy Flynn: (Singing) Give em the old razzle dazzle; razzle dazzle em. Give em an act with lots of flash in it and the reaction will be passionate. Give em the old hocus pocus; bead and feather em. How can they see with sequins in their eyes? What if your hinges all are rusting? What if, in fact, you're just disgusting? Razzle dazzle em, and they'll never catch wise.

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Billy Flynn's Unwavering Stance on Truth and Money

Billy Flynn: When you came to me, I didn't ask if she was guilty, I didn't ask if she was innocent, I didn't ask if she was a drunk, a dope fiend. No, I asked, did you have five thousand dollars, and you told me yes, but you don't have five thousand dollars so I figure you're a dirty liar and I don't do deals with dirty liars! (Amos reaches out to take back the money) However...

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A Humble Apology for Taking Time

Amos Hart: (after singing Mr. Cellophane) Hope I didn't take up too much of your time.

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The Invisible Struggles of Mr. Cellophane

Amos Hart: (Singing) Cellophane, Mr. Cellophane should'a been my name; Mr Cellophane. Cause you can look right through me, walk right by me, and never know I'm there.

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Perception of Worth in Relationships

Amos Hart: (Singing) A human being's made of more than air? With all that bulk you're bound to see em there! ...Unless that human bein next to you, is unimpressive, undistingushed, you... know... who.

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A Moment of Realization and Regret

Amos Hart: Boy, what a sap I was!

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Questioning the Performance of a Rival

Roxie Hart: (Velma just sung "I Can't Do It Alone") So where was the part where you blew her brains out??

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Advice on Caramels from Roxie Hart

Roxie Hart: Oh, and by the way, here's a piece of advice from me to you: lay off the caramels.

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Obituary Mention and Trial Update

Roxie Hart: You were mentioned in the paper today, in the back with the obituaries. Velma Kelly's trial has been postponed indefinitely. Seven words.

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Fashion Discontent in Chicago's Roxie Hart

Roxie Hart: This dress makes me look like a Woolworths lamp shade! I'm not wearing this dress!

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Consequences of Infidelity and Distraction

Roxie Hart: And then I started foolin around... and then I started screwin around, which is foolin around without dinner.

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Struggling with Identity and Expectations

Roxie Hart: (In a Southern accent) I was born on a beautiful Southern convent... (In a normal voice) Oh, holy shit! I'm never gonna get this straight!!!

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The Artistic Perspective on Murder

Roxie Hart: (Singing) Who says that murder's not an art?

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Questioning Motives Behind a Crime

Roxie Hart: (At a press conference, protesting her innocence) I bet you want to know why I shot the bastard?

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Embracing Choices in Life and Love

Roxie Hart: (Singing) You can like the life you're living, you can live the life you like. You can even marry Harry, and mess around with Ike!

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Celebrating Life's Pleasures and Joys

Roxie Hart: (Singing) And that's good, isn't it? Grand, isn't it? Great, isn't it? Swell, isn't it? Fun, isn't it?

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The Interplay of Love and Showbiz

Roxie Hart: My audience loves me. And I love them. And they love me for lovin them and I love them for lovin me. And we love each other. And that's cause none of us got enough love in our childhoods. And that's showbiz, kid.

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Business Rivalry in the Entertainment Industry

Velma Kelly: (After Roxie turns down her idea of doing a double act together saying "It'll never work./'Cause I hate you!") There's only one business in the world where that's no problem at all.....(raises eyebrow and grins slyly...leads into Nowadays)

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Questioning Talent in a Competitive World

Velma Kelly: What's your talent; washing and drying?

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Frustration Overwhelms Velma Kelly

Velma Kelly: I just can't take it anymore! You can't go anywhere without hearing about that dumb tomato! (Mama sits up with her hair dyed like Roxie's) Oh, no, Mama, not you too.

Self-Interest in Legal Advice

Velma Kelly: You wanted my advice, right? Well here it is. Don't forget Billy Flynn's number one client is... Billy Flynn.

A Sister's Perspective on Men

Velma Kelly: (Singing) She'd say, "What's your sister like?" I'd say, "Men.

Celebrating Life and Freedom Through Jazz

Velma Kelly: (Singing) No, I'm no one's wife, but oh, I love my life!! And all... that... Jazz!!!!

The Legacy of a Dueling Duo

Velma Kelly: (Singing) My sister and I had an act that couldn't flop. My sister and I were headed straight for the top! My sister and I made a thou, a week at least- oh yea- but my sister is now unfortunately deceased. I know it's sad, of course, but a fact, is still a fact. And now all that remains, is the remains of a perfect, double, act!

Boundaries in Relationships

Velma Kelly: Look honey, you want some advice? Well, here it is, direct from me to you. Keep your paws off my underwear, kay?

Velma Kelly's Reflection on Cicero

Velma Kelly: (Smoking her cigarette and smoke puffs from her red lips) Cicero.

Velma's Frustration Over Roxie's Actions

Velma Kelly: (Listening to a description of Roxie's trial on the radio) Oh, mama, she stole my garter...(grabs radio and shakes it) She stole my garters! First she steals my publicity, then she steals my lawyer, my trial date, and now she steals my goddamn garter!

Celebrating Life and Jazz in the City

Velma Kelly: (Singing) Come on babe, why don't we paint the town? And all that jazz! I'm gonna rouge my knees and roll my stockings down... And all that jazz! Start the car, I know a whoopie spot, where the gin is cold and the piano's hot! It's just a noisy hall where there's a nightly brawl, and all... that... jazz!

Betrayal and Consequences in a Performance Act

Velma Kelly: My sister Veronica and I had this double act, and my husband Charlie traveled around with us. Now for the last number in our act, we did these twenty acrobatic tricks in a row. One, two, three, four, five, splits, spread-eagles, backflips, flip-flops, one right after the other. So this one night before the show, we're down at the Hotel Cicero; the three of us, boozin'... having a few laughs. And we ran out of ice, so I go out to get some. I come back... open the door... and there's Veronica and Charlie, doing number seventeen: the spread-eagle. Well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out, I can't remember a thing. It wasn't until later...when I was washing the blood off my hands, I even knew they were dead!