Unexpected Revelations During a Road Trip
Kyle:
Well, we had a few drinks, danced a little, and... y'know.
E.L.:
No, we don't know. Why don't you tell us?
E.L.:
What the hell is that?! Did you kill a cheetah?
Kyle: [puts them up to his face and sniffs them, much to everyone's disgust]
What? No, these are her underwear! She gave them to me! I boinked her!
E.L.:
... "boinked"?
Josh:
Well, Kyle, I certainly hope you got all the "boinking" out of your system, because we got a lot of driving to do today, guys.
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Inappropriate Content and Relationships Discussed
E.L.:
Barry, fast forward to the horny stuff.
E.L.:
Is this the kind of shit you've been sending Tiffany?
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Debate Over Feeding Mitch during Road Trip
Barry:
Can we please feed Mitch now?
Rubin:
No. If he overeats, he could die.
Barry:
So? It would be worth it.
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A Lighthearted Moment in Road Trip
E.L.:
Barry, hit the lights. It's boner time!
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E.L. Adjusts the Number of Fingers
E.L.:
Did I say two fingers? Better make that three.
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E.L. Challenges a Distance with Humor
E.L.:
Hey, it's 10 feet. Bob Hope could jump this in his golf cart. See, watch, I can spit across it.
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Questioning a Cheetah's Fate
E.L.:
Did you kill a cheetah?
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Impending Consequences of Poor Decisions
E.L.:
Yep. I'd give us about 20 minutes before our first ass-raping.
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Embracing Opportunities and Self-Reflection in College
E.L.:
You're already cheating! Anytime you pass up sex, you're cheating on yourself. Think about it Josh, you're in college. The window of opportunity to drink and do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day.
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Barry Confuses Austin's Location
Barry:
Austin? Austin, Massachusetts?
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The Struggles of a Dreaming Salmon
Barry: [singing]
Tiny salmon swimming in a stream / Tiny salmon chasing that impossible dream / The mynah bird says, "Caw. Ca-Caw" / The chimpanzee says, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" / The friendly owl says, "Hoo, hoo-hoo" / But the salmon can only say, "Bloobloobloobloo. Blooboloobloobloo. Blooboloobolooooo-Blooblooo-Bloobloobloo." / And it's sad.
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Embracing Unleashed Energy
Barry: [attempts to convince the snake to eat a mouse]
Unleash the fury!
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