12 Things That Happened on ‘Friends’ That Would Be Weird in Real Life
By Rachel Horner
"Friends" is basically everyone's favorite show, and for good reason. It's funny, relatable, and littered with laugh-out-loud moments. But, sometimes, it can get a little too crazy. Here are 12 things that happened on "Friends" that would be straight-up weird if they happened in real life.
1. Trying to incorporate sharks into your sex life
"The One With the Sharks" Walking in on your husband getting his jollies is uncomfortable enough, and when it looks like he's doing it with the help of shark attack shows, it gets weirder. We understand Monica being freaked out, but if you spend that much time with someone, you would probably know by now if they were into some kinky stuff. Instead of having a conversation like a normal adult, Monica decides to work "shark porn" into her sex life with Chandler. Both Chandler and everyone around the world respond with a "huh?" But in the "Friends" universe, it just turns into a "Oh, honey you are so silly" kind of scenario. In real life, this would've ended in tears.
2. Putting a raw turkey on your head to cheer up your secret boyfriend
"The One With All the Thanksgivings" Listen, we all do crazy stuff for love, but no one in their right mind would put a raw turkey on their head to cheer up ANYONE. Maybe Beyoncé, but that's it. Not only would you not be able to breathe correctly, but raw poultry is swimming in gross stuff, and it would definitely end in some kind of infection. NOPE.
3. Pretending to get an annulment
"The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel" We get that Rachel and Ross are good friends, but, in real life, the Ross in a fake-annulment situation would be hit with a restraining order at the very least. And when Ross tells Phoebe, she realizes it's messed up, but doesn't tell Rachel. In real life, you tell your friends when they are married and don't know it!
4. Bringing rat babies to your friend's birthday party
"The One With Phoebe's Rats" Phoebe is weird; we know this. Sometimes the Powers That Be at "Friends" take her a little too far off the edge. Caring for rat babies is one thing, but taking them to your best friend's birthday party? Why? Even more strange: they just let her keep them there. A real-life Monica would've had those rats removed immediately.
5. Trying to make a move on your cousin
"The One With Ross and Monica's Cousin" This whole episode is a weird one, but nothing is stranger than Ross trying to make out with his cousin. We get that she's pretty hot, but Ross already has one incest strike against him from that time it was revealed he kissed Monica accidentally. This is a sitcom, not "Game of Thrones." We are uncomfortable. If one of our cousins tried to make out with us, we would notify every family member and make sure they weren't invited to any reunions.
6. Dating your ex's hot, younger son
"The One With Chandler in a Box" Monica, we get it, Richard's son is great to look at and so very sweet, but when you think about this situation in real-life, it would never happen. At least to normal, stable humans. If things worked out, your father-in-law would be a guy who saw you naked multiple times. In the end, Monica realizes it isn't going to work out and would be too weird, but even trying is a no. This whole thing is so weird, Monica wearing an eyepatch seems like a normal, everyday activity.
7. Ross getting a monkey
"The One With the Monkey" If you saw a man walking around New York City with a monkey on his shoulder, you would not think that man was all there in the head. Also, in real life, this monkey would probably claw your face off if you tried to keep him in your apartment. Sorry to rain on your monkey dreams.
8. Switching apartments
"The One With the Embryos" Everyone loves a little healthy competition, so bets happen. You know what isn't healthy? Betting your apartment. Especially in New York City, a city with some of the strictest tenant laws in the country. In real life, no one likes moving, so even if they wanted the apartment, the thought of packing would change their mind. Also, if you already spend 90% of your time in that other apartment anyway, why do you need to move there?!
9. Dating your twin sister's stalker
"The One With the Jam" I don't care how out there Phoebe is, she would not date a stalker. In real life and in "Friends," this is just plain strange. Police would be called, restraining orders would be filed, and paranoia would set in.
10. Poking a sleeping naked guy with a stick
"The One With the Giant Poking Device" Being concerned about your neighbor being dead is very normal if they haven't moved for a long time. But, in real life, we call the police. We do not fashion the world's longest poking device so we can poke Ugly Naked Guy and make sure he isn't dead.
11. Watching free porn all day
"The One With the Free Porn" We get it, guys like porn. But, in real life, if you had guy friends who refused to leave their house or change the channel because they can't miss any free porn, you wouldn't be friends with those guys anymore. You also wouldn't go over and hang out like normal while multiple people are running around naked on TV.
12. Dating a guy named Tag
"The One With Rachel's Assistant" Rachel is not the first fictional, or real, person to date their subordinate. So, that's not what is weird here. It's wrong and against all the rules, but not weird. What is strange, though, is dating a guy named Tag. That is not a name.
