Adam Goldberg Quotes

Mike Look, I've got a confession to make.

Tony What do you mean a confession?

Mike You know how for like the last year or so I've been talking about going to law school so I can become a ACLU lawyer to be in a position to help people getting fucked over and all that? Well I'm standing in line at the post office yesterday, you know, and I'm looking around and everybody's looking really pathetic. You know what I mean? Like people have just got drool sticking there, and like this guy's bending over and you can see the crack of his ass. It was all just, like, wife beaters, it was.. Anyway, I realize that I just don't want to do it. You know what I mean? It sounds good and all, but I just have to confront the fact that I really don't like the people I've been talking about helping out. You know what I'm saying? I don't like people period. I mean you guys are okay. I don't know. I'm just trying to be honest about being a misanthrope.

Tony So you're not going to law school? What do you want to do?

Mike I wanna dance!

Tony You might want to read this.

Ben Ah, no thanks.

Tony Yeah? "I've lost a guy, and l don't know why. What went wrong? When I started writing this month's column, I wanted to commit the certain silly dating faux pas. What l didn't realize was that I was making the biggest mistake of all." Here. Trust me. Read it.

Tony So there I am, getting it on with this perfect female body and...

Mike What?

Tony I can't say.

Mike No, you can't give a build-up like that and not deliver. You know, a perfect female body, it’s not a bad start.

Tony But with the head of ]. With the hat and the beard, everything. Well, best not to think too deep on it.

Mike Best not.

Tony Look, I'll see you later.

Mike See you later. Sorry.

Cynthia God, don't you ever feel like everything we do and everything we've been taught is just to service the future?

Tony Yeah I know, like it's all preparation.

Cynthia Right. But what are we preparing ourselves for?

Mike Death.

Tony Life of the party.

Mike It's true.

Cynthia You know, but that's valid because if we are all gonna die anyway shouldn't we be enjoying ourselves now? You know, I'd like to quit thinking of the present, like right now, as some minor insignificant preamble to something else.