Alan RickmanQuotes

Victim: Your aim is to debase and humiliate a human being, there is no justification for cruelty.

Interrogator: Our aim is to rid society of negative influences. The end justifies the use of certain unorthodox means.

Victim: [repeats] Your aim is to debase and humiliate a being, there is no justification for cruelty.

Interrogator: Our aim is to rid society of negative influences.

Victim: [shouts] ...There is no justification for cruelty, there is no justification for cruelty. There is no justification!

Interrogator: Our aim is to rid society of negative influences... There is no justification for cruelty of any kind.

Interrogator: I don't like all this you know. I tell myself it's just a job and then in my dreams these words float by: Because thou hast the power and ownst the grace to see through and behind this mask of me, against which the years have beat thus blenchingly with their rains, and behold my soul's true face." It seems so long ago. My soul's true face.

Interrogator: Your best hope would be to de-personalize what follows and not to look upon me as a foe or yourself as a victim. Remember, we are both seekers of truth, and in this quest, I am your friend, philosopher, and guide.

Interrogator: You would do well to depersonalize what follows.

Eamon de Valera: You published the terms without MY agreement!

Michael Collins: They were the best we could get.

Eamon de Valera: In your opinion!

Michael Collins: And what's more, Dev, you sent me there because you knew they were best we could get.

Eamon de Valera: That is idle speculation.

Eamon de Valera: What would you know about peace?

Michael Collins: When I agreed to go to London, you said we could negotiate on behalf of the Irish people and our government, the Dáil. If they accept it, I accept it; if they reject it I reject it. And I want to know you'll do the same.

Eamon de Valera: If we are to negotiate as a legitimate government, our armed forces must act like a legitimate army.

Michael Collins: What, exactly, do you mean, Dev?

Eamon de Valera: I mean large scale engagements.

Michael Collins: You mean, like, in 1916? The great, heroic, ethical failure. All marchin in step towards slaughter. Why don't we save them all the bother and blow our own brains out?!

Cathal Brugha: How dare you!

Michael Collins: How do you think we even got them to this point? Where they'll even consider talking? We brought them to their knees the only way we could!

Eamon de Valera: They call us murderers.

Michael Collins: War is murder! Sheer bloody murder! If you'd been here for the past year, you'd know that!

Eamon de Valera: Wait, Michael, wait...

Michael Collins: Till when?

Eamon de Valera: Until the next time.

Harry Boland: What happens next time?

Michael Collins: We won't play by their rules, Harry. We'll invent our own.

Joey Ramone: We got four songs: I Don't Wanna Walk Around with You, I Don Wanna Be Learned, I Don't Wanna Be Tamed and I Don't Wanna Go Down to the Basement.

Hilly Kristal: A lot of things you don't wanna do.

Joey Ramone: Yeah…

Hilly Kristal: Anything you wanna do?

Joey Ramone: We're working on something now.

Hilly Kristal: Something positive?

Joey Ramone: Yeah, it's called… I Wanna Sniff Some Glue.

Alexander Dane: Fred's no good, Jason; you're just gonna have to kill it.

Jason Nesmith: Kill it"? Well, I'm open to any suggestions!

Tommy Webber: Go for the eyes, like in Episode 22!

Jason Nesmith: It doesn't have any eyes, Tommy!

Tommy Webber: Well, then go for the throat or mouth, its vulnerable spots!

Jason Nesmith: It's a rock: It doesn't have any vulnerable spots!

Guy Fleegman: [[weapon] I know! You construct a ]. Look around you. Can you form some sort of rudimentary lathe?

Jason Nesmith: A LATHE?! GET OFF THE LINE, GUY!! Alexander, you're my advisor. Advise me!

Alexander Dane: Well, you're just gonna have to figure out what it wants. What is its motivation?

Jason Nesmith: It's a rock monster! It doesn't have motivation!

Alexander Dane: You see, this was your problem, Jason. You were never serious about the craft!

Jason Nesmith: What? what was that?

Alexander Dane: Uh, nothing.

Jason Nesmith: I heard some squealin or somethin'.

Gwen DeMarco: Oh, no. Everything's fine.

Teb: But the animal is inside out.

Jason Nesmith: I heard that! It turned inside out?

Teb: And it exploded.

Jason Nesmith: Did I just hear that the animal turned inside out, and then it exploded? Hello?

Gwen DeMarco: [Flipping a bit of pig-lizard off her communicator] Hold, please.

Alexander Dane: Could they be the miners?

Fred Kwan: Sure, they're like, three years old.

Alexander Dane: Miners. Not minors.

Fred Kwan: You lost me.

Guy Fleegman: [whimpering] I changed my mind; I wanna go back.

Alexander Dane: After all the fuss you made about getting left behind?

Guy Fleegman: Yeah, but that's when I thought I was the crewman that stays on the ship and something is up there and it kills me. But now I'm thinking I'm the guy that gets killed by some monster five minutes after we land on the planet.

Jason Nesmith: You're not gonna die on the planet, Guy.

Guy Fleegman: I'm not? Then what's my last name?

Jason Nesmith: It's, uh, uh-- I don't know.

Guy Fleegman: Nobody knows. You know why? Because my character isn't important enough for a last name, because I'm gonna die five minutes in.

Gwen DeMarco: Guy, you have a last name.

Guy Fleegman: [puts his head on Gwen's shoulder and cries] DO I??!! DO I??!! FOR ALL YOU KNOW, I'M "CREWMAN #6"! Mommy! Mommy!

Alexander Dane: [wearily] Are we there yet?

Gwen DeMarco: Alex, where are you going?

Alexander Dane: To see if there's a pub!

Computer: Forward thruster shaft, 87% damage. Aft vector guards, 96% damage. Structural breaches in quadrants 32, 34, 40...

Jason Nesmith: What about the engines?

Computer: Forward thruster shaft, 87% damage.

Gwen DeMarco: Computer, what about the engines? Why don't we have power?

Computer: The beryllium sphere has fractured under stress.

Gwen DeMarco: It's fractured.

Jason Nesmith: Can it be repaired?

Gwen DeMarco: Computer, can it be repaired?

Computer: Damage to beryllium sphere: Irreparable. New source of beryllium must be secured.

Gwen DeMarco: We need another one.

Alexander Dane: [to Jason] You broke the ship. You broke the bloody ship!

Jason Nesmith: [clears throat] Eh, uh-- Computer, is there, uh, a replacement Beryllium sphere on board?

Gwen DeMarco: Computer, is there a replacement Beryllium sphere on board?

Computer: Negative, no reserve Beryllium sphere exists on board.

Gwen DeMarco: [to crew] No, we have no extra Beryllium sphere on board.

Tommy Webber: You know, that is really getting annoying!

Gwen DeMarco: Look! I have one job on this lousy ship. It's stupid, but I'm gonna do it! Okay?

Tommy Webber: Sure, no problem.

Alexander Dane: Could you possibly try not to hit every...single...one?!

Tommy Webber: Sorry, man, they're driftin towards us! I think they're magnetic!

Mathesar: The medical quarters are to the left.

Tommy Webber: What the hell is going on?

Alexander Dane: Jason, what have you gotten us into?

Gwen DeMarco: I don't believe this, it's insane.

Fred Kwan: Wow, the floors are so clean.

Jason Nesmith: [Keeping Dane from running away] Come on, old friend!

Alexander Dane: Old friend?! You stole all my best lines, you cut me out of episode two entirely!

Alexander Dane: How did I come to this?

Tommy Webber: Not again.

Alexander Dane: [[Richard III (play)|Richard III] I played ].

Fred Kwan: Five curtain calls.

Alexander Dane: There were five curtain calls. I was an actor once, damn it. Now look at me. Look at me! I can't go out there, and I won't say that stupid line one more time. I can't. I won't.

Gwen DeMarco: Well, Alex, at least you had a part. Okay? You played a character people loved. I mean, my TV Guide interview was six paragraphs about my boobs and how they fit into my suit! No one even bothered to ask what I do on the show.

Fred Kwan: You had the - wait. Wait, I'll think of it.

Gwen DeMarco: I repeated the computer, Fred.

Alexander Dane: By Grabthar's Hammer, by the Suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged.

Alexander Dane: [to Jason, after Jason fights Gorignak] I see you managed to get your shirt off.

Alexander Dane: [completely deadpan] By Grabthar's Hammer... what a savings.

Rufus, the Clerk: Looking for anything in particular, sir?

Harry: Ah, yeah. That necklace there, how much is it?

Rufus: It's £270, sir.

Harry: Oh, alright, I'll have it, thanks.

Clerk: Lovely. Would you like it gift-wrapped?

Harry: Oh. Yeah, why not.

Clerk: Lovely. Just pop that in there. (puts in in a box, measures out ribbon)

Harry: Can we be quite quick?

Clerk: Certainly, sir. Ready in the flashiest of flashes. (ties ribbon) There.

Harry: That's great!

Clerk: Not...quite. (gets a small bag)

Harry: I don't need a bag, I'll just put it in my pocket.

Clerk: Oh this isn't a bag, sir.

Harry: No?

Clerk: This is so much more than a bag. (puts box in bag and sets it upright)

Harry: Can we be quite quick?

Clerk: Prontissimo! (fills the bag with flowers petals and lavender. Brings out something else)

Harry: What's that?!

Clerk: It's a cinnamon stick, sir.

Harry: Can we get a move on?

Clerk: You won't regret it.

Harry: Wanna bet?

Clerk: There. Almost finished.

Harry: Almost finished"?! What else are you gonna do, you gonna dip it in yoghurt? Cover it in chocolate buttons?

Clerk: No, sir. Just pop it in the Christmas box.

Harry: But I don't want a Christmas box!

Clerk: You said you wanted it gift-wrapped sir.

Harry: I did, but-

Clerk: This is the final flourish, sir.

Harry: Can I just pay?!

Clerk: All we need now...

Harry: Oh God!

Clerk: Is a sprig of holly.

Harry: No! No! No bloody holly!

Karen: Tell me, what would you do in my position?

Harry: What position is that?

Karen: Imagine your husband bought a gold necklace and come Christmas gave it to somebody else...

Harry: Oh, Karen...

Karen: Would you wait around to find out if it's just a necklace, or if it's sex and a necklace, or if worst of all it's a necklace and love? Would you stay, knowing life would always be a little bit worse? Or would you cut and run?

Harry: Oh, God. I am so in the wrong. The classic fool.

Karen: [voice breaking] Yes, but you've also made a fool out of me, and you've made the life I lead foolish too.

Harry: Right, the Christmas party, not my favourite night of the year and your unhappy job to organise.

Mia: Tell me.

Harry: It's basic, really. Find a venue, over-order on the drinks, bulk buy the guacamole and advise the girls to avoid Kevin if they want their breasts unfondled.

Harry: Sarah, turn off your phone and tell me exactly how long you've been working for us.

Sarah: Two years, seven months, three days and what, about two hours.

Harry: And how long have you been in love with Karl, our enigmatic chief designer?

Sarah: Two years, seven months, three days and I'd say about an hour and thirty minutes.

Harry: I thought as much.

Sarah: Do you think everybody knows?

Harry: Yes.

Sarah: Does Karl know?

Harry: Yes.

Sweeney Todd: And who may it be said is your intended, sir?

Judge Turpin: My ward... and pretty as a rosebud.

Sweeney Todd: Pretty as her mother?

Judge Turpin: Wha... what was that?

Sweeney Todd: [smiles] Nothing, sir. Nothing. May we proceed?

Anthony: Where are you taking her? Tell me or I'll...

Judge Turpin: You'll kill me, boy? Well here I stand!

Judge Turpin: Oh yes... such practices. The Geishas of Japan, the concubines of Siam, the catamites of Greece, the harlots of India. I have them all here, drawings of them. Everything you've ever dreamed of doing with a woman. Would you like to see?

Anthony: I think there's been some mistake.

Judge Turpin: I think not. You gandered at my ward, Johanna. You gandered at her. YES, sir, you gandered!

Anthony Hope: I meant no harm.

Judge Turpin: Your meaning is immaterial. Mark me! If I see your face again on this street, you'll rue the day you were born.

Bishop of Hereford: These are my private chambers, my son. (pause) I have priests who would hear your confession. (upon recognizing Robin) I see the boy I knew in the man before me. Welcome home, Robin.

Bishop of Hereford: I asked your father three times if he worshiped the dark one because his answer vexed me so grievously. He said he must meet God with a clear conscience.

Robin: [furious; Robin moves to storm out of the room, only to meet the Sheriff coming in] You lie.

Bishop of Hereford: [Robin slices the Sheriff's face with a dagger then dodges away from the Sheriff's guards as they break in] On your souls, do not shed blood in the house of God!

Sheriff of Nottingham: [berserk] LOCKSLEY! I'm gonna cut your heart out with a spoon!

Robin: Then it begins.

Sheriff of Nottingham: Cousin, I hope you justify your intrusion with news of profound value?

Sir Guy of Gisbourne: I met a hooded man today who bade me warn you not to harm his people.

Sheriff of Nottingham: [to a wench; to Guy] Who told you to cover up? His name?

Sir Guy of Gisbourne: Robin of Locksley.

Sheriff of Nottingham: The prodigal son returns. He's a whelp! This girl could best him. Put it there!

Sir Guy of Gisbourne: Yes, well, this whelp has bested four of my men.

Sheriff of Nottingham: Yes, well, your men were probably drunk. And yet you survived, cousin.

Sir Guy of Gisbourne: I barely survived. He has a companion, a dark skinned foreigner with the marked face of Islam and a Saracens sword.

Sheriff of Nottingham: Yes, yes, I'm sure it would take an army to match these rogues. I trust Locksley's visited his manor and found the home fires still burning!

Sheriff of Nottingham: (after running Guy through) Well at least I didn't use a spoon.

Sheriff of Nottingham: [[money; [Christmas] Just a minute. Robin Hood steals ] from my pocket, forcing me to hurt the public, and they love him for it?! THAT'S IT, THEN!! Cancel the kitchen scraps for lepers and orphans, no more merciful beheadings, and call off ]!

Sheriff of Nottingham: Do you mind Locksley? We've just been married.

Sheriff of Nottingham: I can't do this with all that racket!

Sheriff of Nottingham: Locksley, I'm gonna cut your heart out with a spoon!

Rufus: So what do we do now?

Metatron: Well, I say we get drunk, because I'm all out of ideas.

Bethany: [looking skyward; now crying] WHY?! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME?! I FUCKING HATE YOU! I hate you.

Metatron: He can't hear you, you know.

Bethany: Why didn't you tell me?

Metatron: Would you - could you - have believed me? You had to come to it gradually. Only now, after all you've seen, could you accept the truth.

Bethany: I don't want this. It's too big.

Metatron: That's what Jesus said. Yeah... I had to tell him. And you can imagine how that hurt the Father, that one word from his lips would destroy the Son's frail human body. So, I had to tell a scared child who wanted nothing more than to play with other children that he was God's only son, and that it meant a life of persecution and eventual crucifixion at the hands of the very people he had come to enlighten and redeem. He begged me to take it all back, as if I could. He begged me to make it all not true'. And I'll let you in on something, Bethany. It's something I've never told anyone before: if I had the power, I would have. It's unfair! It's unfair to ask a child to shoulder that responsibility, and it's unfair to ask you to do the same. I sympathize, I do. I wish I could take it all back. But I can't. This is who you are.

Bethany: Everything I am has been a lie.

Metatron: No, no, no! Knowing what you now know doesn't mean you're not who you were. You are Bethany Sloane - no one can take that away from you, not even God. All this means is a new definition of that identity. The incorporation of this new data into who you are. Be who you've always been. Just be this as well... from time to time.

Bethany: [chuckles mirthlessly] I guess this mean no more cheating on my taxes.

Metatron: [smiles] To say the least.

Metatron: I am to charge you with a holy crusade.

Bethany: For the record, I work in an abortion clinic.

Metatron: [[w:Noah's Ark|ark] {{w|Noah}} was a drunk, look what he accomplished. And no one's even asking you to build an ]. All you have to do is go to New Jersey and visit a small church on a very important day.

Bethany: New Jersey? That doesn't sound like much of a crusade.

Metatron: Aside from the fine print, that's it.

Bethany: What's the fine print?

Metatron: [Mumbling into glass] Stop-a-couple-of-angels-from-entering-and-thus-negating-all-existence.

Bethany: Wait, wait, wait. Repeat that.

Metatron: [Annoyed] Stop a couple of angels from entering and thus negating all existence. I hate when people need it spelled out for them!

Metatron: Metatron acts as the voice of God. Any documented occasion when some yahoo claims that God has spoken to them, they're speaking to me. Or they're talking to themselves.

Bethany: Well... why doesn't God speak for Himself?

Metatron: Glad you decided to join the conversation. To answer that: human beings have neither the aural nor the psychological capacity to withstand the awesome power of God's true voice. Were you to hear it, your mind would cave in and your heart would explode within your chest. We went through five {{w|Adam}}s before we figured that one out.

Metatron: Behold the Metatron, herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true God. Behold the Metatron, herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true God. Behold the Metatron, herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true...

Metatron: Ah, Sweet Jesus! Did you have to use the whole can?!

Bethany: Who the fuck are you and what the fuck are you doing in my room?!

Metatron: I'm the one that's soaked and she's the one that's surly, that's rich. Stupid... fucking Christ...

Bethany: Get the fuck out of here! Now!

Metatron: Or you'll do what, exactly? Hit me with that...fffffish?

Metatron: Now, just sit down on the bed and shut up. Jesus wept... Look at my suit!

Bethany: Look, just take whatever you want, but don't kill or rape me.

Metatron: [Drops his pants to show blank skin where his genitals should be; Bethany tosses it to him and he starts wiping his clothes dry] Oh, give over, will you? I couldn't rape you if I wanted to; Angels are ill-equipped! See? I'm as anatomically impaired as a Ken doll. Now make yourself useful and gimme that towel, will you? Honestly, you bottom feeders and your arrogance, you think everybody's just trying to get in your knickers.

Bethany: What are you?

Metatron: I'm pissed off, is what I am! Do you go around drenching everybody that comes into your room with flame-retardant chemicals? No wonder you're single.

Metatron: [[The Ten Commandments (1956 film)|Charlton Heston movie] Tell a person that you're the Metatron, and they stare at you blankly. Mention something out of a ] and suddenly everybody's a theology scholar! May I continue uninterrupted?

Metatron: [Bethany stares blankly.; She continues staring blankly.] As I was saying - prior to your firefighting episode - I am... the Metatron. Don't tell me the name doesn't ring a bell. You people! If there isn't a movie about it, it's not worth knowing, is it?

Professor McGonagall: Potter, take Weasley with you. He looks far too happy over there.

Arthur Weasley: Times like these, dark times, they do funny things to people. They can tear them apart.

Luna Lovegood: I've never been to this part of the castle. Well, not when I'm awake. I sleep-walk, you see. That's why I wear shoes to bed.

Katie Bell: I know you're going to ask Harry, but I don't know who cursed me. I’ve been trying to remember, honestly. But I just can’t.

Severus Snape: You dare use my own spells against me, Potter? Yes. I'm the Half-Blood Prince.

John McClane: So that's what this is about? A fucking robbery?

Hans Gruber: [with his pistol pointed to Holly's head] Put down the gun.

John McClane: Why'd you have to nuke the whole building, Hans?

Hans Gruber: Well, when you steal $600, you can just disappear. When you steal 600 million, they will find you, unless they think you're already dead. Put down... the gun.

Hans Gruber: [to Eddie] Nein! Dies ist meins!

John McClane: You got me.

Hans Gruber: [[Grace Kelly] Still the cowboy, Mr. McClane. Americans, all alike. Well, this time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset with ].

John McClane: [[W:Gary Cooper|Gary Cooper] That's ], asshole.

Hans Gruber: Enough jokes.

John McClane: You'd have made a pretty good cowboy yourself, Hans.

Hans Gruber: [draw his pistol away from Holly] Oh, yes. What was it you said to me before? "Yippee ki-yay, motherfucker.

Holly Gennero-McClane: [noticing Hans taking the bearer bonds] After all your posturing, all your little speeches, you're nothing but a common thief.

Hans Gruber: I am an exceptional thief, Mrs. McClane. And since I'm moving up to kidnapping, you should be more polite!

Theo: Those guys in the suits, I don't know who they are.

Hans Gruber: That's the FBI. They're ordering the others to cut the building's power. Regular as clockwork.

Theo: [grins in realization] Or a time lock.

Hans Gruber: Precisely. The circuits that cannot be cut are cut automatically in response to a terrorist incident. You asked for miracles, Theo. I give you the F...B...I...

Hans Gruber: I thought I told all of you, I want radio silence until further no--

John McClane: Ooh, I'm very sorry Hans. I didn't get that message. Maybe you should've put it on the bulletin board. I figured since I've waxed Tony and Marco and his friend here, I figured you and Karl and Franco might be a little lonely, so I decided to give you a call.

Karl Vreski: [to Hans; Hans shushes Karl, then back to his walkie-talkie] How does he know so much about--?

Hans Gruber: That's very kind of you. I assume you are our mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome for a security guard.

John McClane: [imitates buzzer; [w:Jeopardy!#Double Jeopardy! Round|Double Jeopardy; reaches into a terrorist's backpack, and pulls out a box of cigarettes] Sorry, Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for ] where the scores can really change? Hmm, these are very bad for you.

Hans Gruber: Who are you, then?

John McClane: [pulls out an explosive from a terrorist's backpack] Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass. Whoa.

Hans Gruber: [Karl and Franco leave as McClane puts the explosive in his backpack before picking up his gun before walking away] Check on all the others. Don’t use the radio. See if he’s lying about Marco and find out that anyone else is missing. Mr. Mystery Guest? Are you still there?

John McClane: Yeah, I'm still here. Unless you wanna open the front door for me.

Hans Gruber: [[John Wayne; [John Rambo|Rambo; [w:Marshal Matt Dillon|Marshall Dillon] Uh, no, I'm afraid not. But you have me at a loss. You know my name, but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's ]? ]? ]?

John McClane: [[w:Roy Rogers|Roy Rogers] I was always kinda partial to ], actually. I really liked those sequined shirts.

Hans Gruber: Do you really think you have a chance against us, Mister Cowboy?

John McClane: [quietly; walks through a door and out of sight] Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.

Severus Snape: [last words, as Harry collects his tears; dies] Take them to the Pensieve. Look at me. You have your mother's eyes.

Severus Snape: [looks at Malfoy; looks at Harry, who is taking notes] There will be no wand-waving or silly incantations in this class. As such, I don't expect many of you to appreciate the subtle science and exact art that is potion-making. However, for those select few , who possess the predisposition, I can teach you how to bewitch the mind and ensnare the senses. I can tell you how to bottle fame, brew glory, and even put a stopper in death. Then again, maybe some of you have come to Hogwarts in possession of abilities so formidable that you feel confident enough... to not pay attention.