Alicia SilverstoneQuotes

Eve: I made some champagne cocktails, like you requested. Funny, I only thought hookers drank these things.

Adam: I know Mom sure likes them.

Troy: [Eve leaves the bedroom; shows Eve something] Eve, look what I found in the suitcase. It's stock certificates. I mean, it's got, like-- It's got, like, IBM and AT&T and Polaroid and... "Ipana"? I remember this brand. I didn't know they still made this. Oh. Look at this. It says "Trademark 1961.

Stockbroker: Purchased in 1958 and 59... ten thousand shares of each? They'd be worth millions. Hell, I don't know. Millions upon millions...

Troy: [has Eve faces him] Upon millions. The stocks, the baseball cards... the clothes... the toothpaste. The guy's on the level. Eve, a man walks into your life, who's the kindest, most polite, most incredibly rich guy you've ever met.

Eve: And I have him committed.

Troy: Yes, you did.

Eve: Well at least I fell for him before I found out he was rich.

Susan Heffley: Greg Heffley! You are grounded for life! And I swear, never again will you play a video game as long as there is breath in my body.

Susan Heffley: The pig's better potty trained than you, Greg.

Susan Heffley: The only connection we're gonna do, is with each other.

Susan Heffley: This is an unplugged road trip.

Cher: [after Tai is hit in the head by a flying clog] If it's a concussion, you have to keep her concious, okay? Ask her questions.

Tai: [pointing at Amber] Cher, ain't that the same dress that you was wearing yesterday?

Cher: Say, Ambular.

Amber: Hi!

Cher: Was that you going through my laundry?

Amber: As if! Like I would really wear something from Judy's.

Cher: Do you prefer "fashion victim" or "ensemble-y challenged"?

Mel: So, uh, what'd you do at school today?

Cher: Well... I broke in my purple clogs.

Cher: I wanna do something good for humanity.

Josh: How about sterilization?

Cher: I've got an idea. Let's do a makeover!

Tai: No. No.

Dionne: Oh, c'mon! Let us! Cher's main thrill in life is a makeover. Okay, it gives her a sense of control on a world full of chaos.

Cher: Please?

Tai: Sure. Why not? Shit, you guys! I've never had straight friends before.

Murray: Woman, lend me five dollars.

Dionne: Murray, I have asked you repeatedly not to call me "woman"!

Murray: Excuse me, Miss Dionne.

Dionne: Thank you.

Murray: [hops away] Okay, but street slang is an increasingly valid form of expression. Most of the feminine pronouns do have mocking but not necessarily misogynistic undertone.

Tai: Wow! You guys talk like grown-ups.

Cher: Oh, well, this is a really good school.

Tai: I could really use some sort of a herbal refreshment.

Dionne: [[w:Coca-Cola|Coke] Oh, well, we do lunch in ten minutes. We don't have any tea, but we have ] and stuff.

Tai: [[w:Cocaine|coke] No shit! You guys got ] here?

Dionne: Well, yeah.

Cher: Yeah, this is America.

Cher: Ms. Stoeger? I would just like to say that physical education in this school is a disgrace. I mean, standing in line for 40 minutes is hardly aerobically effective. I doubt I've worked off the calories in a stick of Carefree gum.

Ms. Stoeger: Well, you certainly exercised your mouth, Cher. Now, hit the ball.

Cher: Ms. Stoeger, that machine is just a lawsuit waiting to happen!

Ms. Stoeger: Thanks for the legal advice.

Cher: Would you call me selfish?

Dionne: No. Not to your face.

Josh: [[Mark Wahlberg|Marky Mark] We might get ] to plant a celebrity tree.

Cher: How fabulous. Getting Marky Mark to take time from his busy pants-dropping schedule to plant trees. Josh, why don't you just hire a gardener?

Josh: You know, maybe Marky Mark wants to use his popularity for a good cause, make a contribution. In case you've never heard of that, a contribution is the giving of...

Cher: Excuse me, but I've donated many expensive Italian outfits to Lucy...

Josh: Time... funds...

Cher: And as soon as I get my license, I fully intend to brake for animals, and I have contributed many hours to helping two lonely teachers find romance.

Josh: Which I'll bet serves your interests more than theirs. You know, if I ever saw you do something that wasn't 90% selfish, I'd die of shock.

Cher: Oh, that'd be reason enough for me.

Josh: Hey, James Bond, in America we drive on the right side of the road.

Cher: I am. You try driving in platforms.

Dionne: [[w:Shakespeare's sonnets|Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, but thy eternal summer shall not fade.] ]" Phat! Did you write that?

Cher: Duh, it's, like, a famous quote.

Dionne: From where?

Cher: [[w:CliffsNotes|Cliff's Notes] ].

Mel: So, Josh, have you given any thought to our little discussion about Corporate Law?

Josh: Yeah, you know, but I think I'd really like to check out Environmental Law.

Mel: What for? Do you wanna have a miserable, frustrating life?

Cher: Oh, Josh will have that no matter what he does.

Mel: At least he knows what he wants to do. And he's in a good college. I'd like to see you have a little bit of direction.

Cher: I have direction.

Josh: Yeah, towards the mall.

Josh: [[w:Contempo Casuals|Contempo Casual] Hey! In some parts of the universe, maybe not in ], but in some parts, it's considered cool to know what's going on in the world.

Cher: [[w:Kenny G|Kenny G] Thank you, Josh. I so need lessons from you on how to be cool. Tell me that part about ] again?

Cher: So. Okay. Like, right now, for example, the Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" But it's like, when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I said RSVP because it was a sit-down dinner. But people came that, like, did not RSVP, so I was, like, totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day, it was, like, the more the merrier. And so, if the government could just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, we could certainly party with the Haitians. And in conclusion, may I please remind you that it does not say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty?

Cher: Thank you very much.

Mr. Hall: Uh, Amber? Replying?

Amber: Mr. Hall, how can I answer that? The topic is Haiti and she's talking about some little party.

Cher: Hello?! It was his 50th birthday!

Amber: Whatever. If she doesn't do the assignment, I can't do mine.

Cher: [looking at Dionne's hat; [Dr. Seuss] Shopping with ]?

Dionne: [picks up Cher's backpack] Well, at least I wouldn't skin a collie to make my backpack.

Cher: It's faux!