Memorable Quotes from Angel Parker
1 quoteCold-Blooded Lawyers and Family Connections
Woman
Aren't you hot in there?
Jillian
Nope. They say people are descendants from apes but I think my family is descended from reptiles. They're all cold-blooded lawyers.
Woman
Oh, well I uh-
Jillian
What?
Woman
I don't- My family ]. ].
[[w:Objections to evolution|doesn't believe in evolution; [w:Charles Darwin|Darwin and all that; ''Walks away'']
Jillian
Okay. Next. Hi. Chocolate or vanilla?
Joel
Um, I want both.
Jillian
You can't have both. You have to pick one.
Joel
You can give me both if you wanted to.
Jillian
Yeah, but we live in a polite society. There are rules. There are lots of things I'd like to do that I'm not allowed.
Joel
Like what?
Jillian
I don't know- I'd like to walk around naked for an entire year. I'd like to sleep in a tent on ]. Kill a few people. Quite a few, actually.
[[w:Malibu, California|a beach in Malibu]
Joel
I'll have two cups of the chocolate.
Jillian
Well, you can have chocolate. Just one cup.
Joel
But the other girl always gives me two cups!
Jillian
She's not here.
Joel
Well, the other girl's a lot prettier than you are.
Jillian
Alright! First of all, you're seeing me with a hangover- no make-up! Secondly- I'm also a great deal more flexible than the girl who's usually here.
Joel
So, what?
Jillian
Well, you'll find out why it's important and people pee on that girls couch.
Joel's mother
Joel!
[''Approaches'']
Joel
What?
Joel's mother
I thought I told you to wait for me by the car. Why are you eating this junk?
[''Takes ice cream from Joel'']
Joel
I just had one bite.
Joel's mother
Shouldn't you check with the mother before you give ice cream to a child?
[''To Jillian'']
Jillian
I usually do. But- Joel said that you were dying in a hospital. He was so sad. I couldn't resist.
Joel's mother
Joel!
Joel
I didn't say that! She said she wanted to kill people!
Jillian
No! We were discussing ]! He's clearly taking that statement totally out of context.
[[w:Civil liberties|civil liberties]
Joel's mother
Come with me, right now! ] to Jillian]
[''Growls''; ''Joel walks away with his mother and then turns and gives [[w:the finger|the finger]
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