The King of Staten Island - Late Night Conversations and Advice
Scott Carlin:
Ray! I cant sleep, I never go to sleep this early.
Ray Bishop:
Ohh, you know what you should do - you should shut the fuck up. Go to sleep.
Scott Carlin:
Thanks.
Ray Bishop: [[w:NyQuil|NyQuil]
Can't go to sleep... you should dip your weed in ] you fucking drug addict.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Walk of Shame - Media Infiltration and Misunderstanding Unveiled
Sergeant Dave:
Ma'am, did you see a woman in a yellow dress get on that helicopter?
Denise:
I saw Meghan Miles, undercover investigator for KZLA, get on a helicopter.
Officer Walter:
Wait. The woman we're chasing is just a reporter? Dear God, it's worse than we ever imagined. The hooker has infiltrated the media, where she's posing as KZLA's Meghan Miles.
Denise:
What do you mean, she's infiltrated the media?
Rose:
So, you're saying that our best friend Meghan is an undercover hooker?
Officer Walter:
It looks that way.
Sergeant Dave:
So, you have an idiot friend too?
Rose:
Yeah. Mine's by choice. You got stuck with this guy, right?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Walk of Shame - Witness Describes Suspect's Disturbing Appearance
Officer Walter:
You saw this little in the yellow dress steal your bike?
Stolen bike boy:
She was really scary.
Sergeant Dave:
You got a good look at her?
Stolen bike boy:
Yeah. She had these, like, crazy eyes.
Officer Walter:
All right, kid. Come with us. Hop in. We'll do a ride-along, okay?
Stolen bike boy:
But when we find her, I want five minutes alone with her, okay?
Sergeant Dave:
Not okay, creepy kid. Get in the back. Be happy that you're coming. Just concentrate on apprehending the perp.
Stolen bike boy:
Hey, driver, you got to go faster. We have to find the bike.
Sergeant Dave:
It's "Officer.
Sergeant Steve:
Driver"?
Sergeant Dave:
What, your dad rich or something?
Stolen bike boy:
My dad's taxes pay your bills. Find the bike.
Sergeant Dave:
Kid, if you don't shut up, I'm going to drop you off right on this corner.
Stolen bike boy:
God, I just want to find my bike!
Sergeant Dave: [[w:fishing|fishing]
And I just want to be fucking ]!
Officer Walter:
Oh, come on. There you go. You've really hurt his feelings now.
Sergeant Dave:
Well, the kid's an asshole.
Sergeant Dave:
What are you smoking?
Officer Walter: [[w:Electronic cigarette|It's an e-cig]
].
Sergeant Dave:
Fake cigarette. That's dumb.
Stolen bike boy: [[w:Cannabis|I smoke weed]
Well, ]!
Sergeant Dave:
Great. Now we have to arrest you.
Stolen bike boy:
No. I was kidding.
Sergeant Dave:
Well, you're already in the back.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Walk of Shame - Confrontation with Authority and Responsibility
Officer Walter: [[w:prostitution|modern... female entrepreneurs]
I have nothing against... uh, ].
Sergeant Dave:
Do not approach the vehicle. Ma'am, what you're doing is the opposite... of not approaching the vehicle.
Meghan:
But I didn't do anything wrong.
Sergeant Dave: [[w:paperboy|Just wrapping up your paper route]
Really? You haven't done anything wrong? What, are you going out to get some eggs? ]? It's time to grow up.
Officer Walter: [[w:fellatio|Don't be on your knees]
]. Off his streets and grow the fuck up, okay?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.