Memorable Quotes from Chris Eigeman
28 quotesDebating Principles in Social Gatherings
Nick Smith
You're opposed to these parties on principle.
Tom Townsend
Yes.
Nick Smith
Exactly what principle is that?
Tom Townsend
Well...
Nick Smith
The principle that one shouldn't be out at night eating hors d'oeuvres when one could be home worrying about the less fortunate.
Tom Townsend
Pretty much, yes.
Nick Smith
Has it ever occurred to you that you are the less fortunate?
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Aspirations of Failure and Wealth
Nick Smith
But, unlike you, I've always assumed I'd be a failure anyway. That's why I plan to marry an extremely rich woman.
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Mascara Confusion Between Max and Otis
Max
Are you wearing mascara?
Otis
No... yes.
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The Routine of Daily Life
Max
I found myself writing wake up and go to bed in my day planner as if they are two different events.
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Nostalgia and Success After Graduation
Max
I don't need to go to a campus bar to be reminded of my lack of success with a bunch of thrill seeking snotty college kids.
Skippy
That's us; we're like celebrities to them.
Max
No, we were celebrities. Now going back would be like doing Hollywood Squares. I'm too nostalgic, I'll admit it.
Skippy
We graduated four months ago. What can you possibly be nostalgic for?
Max
I'm nostalgic for conversations I had yesterday. I've begun reminiscing events before they even occur. I'm reminiscing this right now. I can't go to the bar because I've already looked back on it in my memory... and I didn't have a good time.
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Questioning Trust and Credibility Among Friends
Jane Clark
Why should we believe you over Rick? We know you're a hypocrite. We know your "Polly Perkins" story was a fabrication...
Nick Smith
A composite.
Jane Clark
Whatever. And that you're completely impossible and out of control, with some sort of drug problem and a fixation on what you consider Rick Von Sloneker's wickedness. You're a snob, a sexist, totally obnoxious and tiresome, and lately you've gotten just weird. Why should we believe anything you say?
Nick Smith
I am not tiresome.
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Understanding Vulnerability in Social Dynamics
Nick Smith
I'm not sure if you realize this, but these girls are at a very vulnerable point in their lives. All of this is much more emotional and difficult for them than it is for us. They're on display. They have to call the guys up and invite them as escorts. And preppy girls mature socially much later than others do.
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Acceptance of Parental Limitations
Nick Smith
The most important thing to realize about parents is that there is absolutely nothing you can do about them.
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Concerns of Downward Social Mobility
Charlie Black
I think that - that - that we are all, in a sense, doomed.
Nick Smith
What are you talking about?
Charlie Black
Downward social mobility. We hear a lot about the great social mobility in America with the focus usually on the comparative ease of moving upwards. What's less discussed is how easy it is to - to go down. I think that's the - the direction that we're all heading in. And I think that the downward fall is gonna be very fast. Not just for us as individuals, but the whole preppy class.
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The Value of Tradition Over Convenience
Nick Smith
You haven't seen this? Detachable collar. Not many people wear them anymore. They look much better. So many things which were better in the past have been abandoned for supposed convenience.
Tom Townsend
I had no idea anyone wore those anymore.
Nick Smith
It's a small thing, but symbolically important. Our parents generation was never interested in keeping up standards. They wanted to be happy, but, of course, the last way to be happy is to make it your objective in life.
Tom Townsend
I wonder if our generation's any better than our parents'.
Nick Smith
Oh, it's far worse. Our generation's probably the worst since - the Protestant Reformation. It's barbaric, but a barbarism even worse than the old-fashioned, straightforward kind. Now barbarism is cloaked with all sorts of self-righteousness and moral superiority. Will you look at this?
Tom Townsend
You're obviously talking about a lot more than just detachable collars.
Nick Smith
Yeah, I am.
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Confusion Over Pajama Top Identification
Max
Is that a pajama top?
Otis
No... Yes.
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Debate on Authenticity and Friendship
Charlie Black
I don't see how you can stand him. You're always complaining about people being frauds and phoneys. This guy is the phoney of the decade, yet you act as he were your long-lost best friend.
Nick Smith
Tom's hardly a phoney. Just mildly deluded. He's a perfectly nice guy.
Charlie Black
That's just another aspect of his phoniness. He's a terrible phoney, and when he's not being a phoney, he's a bastard.
Nick Smith
Oh, come on.
Charlie Black
You saw how he treated Audrey last night.
Nick Smith
Well, Audrey seems to have forgotten it.
Charlie Black
She has to act that way. Otherwise it would be even more humiliating. But I don't have to pretend Tom Townsend is a nice guy.
Nick Smith
You're really gaga about Audrey, aren't you?
Charlie Black
If by "gaga" you mean, do I like her? Yes, I do.
Nick Smith
Well, why don't you do something about it, instead of just going on and on about what a bastard Tom Townsend is.
Charlie Black
What do I do? Declare myself? That would be an absolute disaster. I don't think I haven't thought about these things. But I think if the situation could just continue as it has been, they gradually, over time, it'd grow into something more. That, at least, is what I've been hoping for.
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The Challenge of Strip Poker Diminished
Nick Smith
Playing strip poker with an exhibitionist somehow takes the challenge away.
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Critique of Aristocracy and Self-Perception
Nick Smith
The titled aristocracy are the scum of the earth.
Sally Fowler
You always say "titled" aristocrats. What about "untitled" aristocrats?
Nick Smith
Well, I could hardly despise them, could I? That would be self-hatred.
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Understanding Unconventional Behavior Beyond S&M
Fred Boynton
You are far weirder than someone merely into S&M. At least they have a tradition. We have some idea what S&M is about. There's movies and books about it. But so far as I know, there is nothing to explain the way you are.
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Childhood Borrowing and Its Justifications
Fred Boynton
When we were kids I borrowed some things. It was never ever theft! In each case I either told you... or was about to.
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Teenage Milestones and Growing Up
Kate
I'm going to be 17 tomorrow.
Max
Wow, now you can read ] and get all the references.
[[w:Seventeen Magazine|Seventeen Magazine]
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Late Night Conversations Among Friends
Grover
Gotta go sleep with a freshman.
Max
Yeah, me too.
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From Bad Summer to Bad Life
Max
What I used to be able to pass off as a bad summer could now potentially turn into a bad life.
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The Complex Legacy of the Bourgeoisie
Charlie Black
The term bourgeois has almost always been - been one of contempt. Yet it is precisely the - the bourgeoisie which is responsible for - well, for nearly everything good that has happened in our civilization over the past four centuries. You know the French film, ]? When I first heard that title I thought, "Finally, someone's gonna tell the truth about the bourgeoisie." What a disappointment. It would be hard to imagine a less fair or accurate portrait.
[[w:The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie|The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie]
Sally Fowler
Well, of course. ]'s a ]. Despising the bourgeoisie is part of their credo.
[[w:Luis Buñuel|Buñuel; [Surrealism|surrealist]
Nick Smith
Where do they get off?
Charlie Black
But the truth is, the bourgeoisie does have a lot of charm.
Nick Smith
Of course it does. The surrealists were just a lot of social climbers.
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Concerns About Spreading Affection Too Thin
Max
What about me? You've got enough friends, a new one is bad for you. You start spreading your affection around and it runs thin, believe me.
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Walking Away Like Mothers in Nursery School
Max
This is useless. We just have to walk away like mothers in nursery school.
[to Grover, at the airport, about Otis]
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A Sudden Loss Affects Everyone Involved
Nick Smith
Jane's father's dead. Very suddenly, last year.
Tom Townsend
Must have been awful for her.
Nick Smith
Yes. It was tough on him too.
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Contrasting Traits of an Attractive Character
Nick Smith
Rick Von Slonecker is tall, rich, good-looking, stupid, dishonest, conceited, a bully, liar, drunk and thief, an egomaniac, and probably psychotic. In short, highly attractive to women.
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The Complexity of Social Labels and Language
Charlie Black
Well, I don't think "preppy" is a very useful term. I mean, it might be descriptive for someone who is still in school or college; but, it's ridiculous to refer to a man in his 70s, like Averell Harriman, as a "preppy". And none of the other terms people use - WASP, P.L.U., et cetera - are of much use either. And that's why I prefer the term "U.H.B.
Nick Smith
What?
Charlie Black
U.H.B. It's an acronym for Urban Haute Bourgeoisie.
Cynthia McLean
Is our language so impoverished that we have to use acronyms or French phrases to make ourselves understood?
Charlie Black
Yes.
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Arrogance in Concern for the Less Fortunate
Nick Smith
It's a tiny bit arrogant of people to go around worrying about those less fortunate.
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The Importance of Danceable Jazz
Fred Boynton
My jazz rule is: If you can't dance to it, you don't want to know about it.
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Critique of Romantic Preferences and Perceptions
Nick Smith
It's incredible, the eagerness of girls like you to justify the worst bastards imaginable... as being sensitive and shy. But if any guy who really was shy dared talk to you... you wouldn't give him the time of day - your eyes would glaze over.
Cynthia McLean
You're really hung up on Rick, aren't you? He must really threaten you somehow.
Nick Smith
You're right. I do feel threatened - that I may get a venereal disease from one of the St. Tim's girls he's been with.
Nick Smith
Did you learn that from your lovemaking with Rick? I hear it can get really rough.
Nick Smith
Don't do that again. For me, it isn't erotic.
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