Memorable Quotes from Daryl Keith Roach
1 quotePee-wee Presents Evidence of His Stolen Bike
Pee-wee
This box contains over 217 bits and pieces of information: Evidence. Exhibit A: A photograph of the victims: My bike and me. Exhibit B: Another photograph. What's missing from this picture? It's just me...WITHOUT MY BIKE! Is this something you can share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?! Exhibit C: The horn I was picking up at Chuck's Bike-O-Rama, when my bike was actually stolen. Exhibit D: Jimmy, what is this?
[extracts some evidence, starting with a photograph; exposes a second photograph; Amazing Larry is about to whisper to Mario; Larry reacts, then he extracts...; honks his horn at full blast, and the crowd reacts to it; then he extracts a pen]
Jimmy
Uh...
[thinks]
Pee-wee
Too late! Chip?
Chip
Uh, looks like a pen.
Pee-wee
Exactly! I bought this pen one hour before my bike was stolen. Why?! What's the significance?! I DON'T KNOW! Exhibit Q: A scale-model of the entire mall! X marks the scene of the crime. These arrows here show the exact position of the sun at the hour of the crime. Jupiter was aligned with Pluto! The moon was in the seventh...
[several hours later; points to the scale model with the pointer]
Chuck
Pee-wee!
Pee-wee
Please save your questions until I'm THROUGH, Chuck!
Chuck
Well, when will that be? A long time, we wait! We've been here for over three hours now, and I'm not sure if any of us can see what all this is supposed to mean.
Pee-wee
Supposed to mean"? "Supposed to MEAN"?! I think everyone here knows what this is supposed to mean. When you've gone over something again and again and again and again, like I have. Certain questions get answered. Others spring up! The mind plays tricks on you. You play tricks back! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting... : ...and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting!
[snaps the pointer in half, causing Speck to cower under the laundry; most of the guests leave]
Dottie
Pee-wee, let's go up and get some fresh air, alright?
Pee-wee
What for?
Dottie
Because it's hot in here.
Pee-wee
Hot? Who's hot? Feels just fine to me. I feel just PERFECT! In fact, I can't remember when I felt quite so COZY down here!
Dottie
Pee-wee, I think I can get Chuck to give you a good break on one of the bikes in the shop.
Pee-wee
I don't want some other crappy bike!
Dottie
Well, Pee-wee, listen, if you want my help...
Pee-wee
I DON'T want your help! I don't need the police and I DON'T NEED YOU! I DON'T NEED ANYBODY!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.