The Fortune Cookie - Unexpected Introductions Among Family and Friends
Nun:
Oh, I . . . I'm terribly sorry.
William H. "Whiplash Willie" Gingrich:
All my fault, Sister. I was just trying to, uh, I'm his brother-in-law, Sister.
Nun:
I see.
William H. "Whiplash Willie" Gingrich:
And this is his mother, Sister, and this is my wife, his sister, Sister.
Nun:
How do you do?
William H. "Whiplash Willie" Gingrich:
We were sort of anxious to find out if, uh . . .
Nun:
I understand. But it'll be a few more minutes.
William H. "Whiplash Willie" Gingrich: [to his sobbing mother-in-law]
Thank you, Sister. Shut up, Mother.
Harry Hinkle's mother: [to Charlotte Gingrich]
Poor Harry. He was always so brittle. Remember when he fell off the garage?
Charlotte Gingrich:
Oh, Mother, not that old story again.
William H. "Whiplash Willie" Gingrich:
What story?
Harry Hinkle's mother:
When they were kids in Toledo, he and Charlotte were playing paratrooper. She pushed him off the roof.
Charlotte Gingrich:
I didn't push him, he jumped. And anyway, he had an umbrella. Is it my fault if he forgot to open it?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.