2 Fast 2 Furious - A Disagreement Over Attention to Monica
Rome Pearce:
What you checkin her out for?
Brian:
I'm not checkin her out.
Rome:
Yes, you were.
Brian:
No, I wasn't.
Rome:
I seen you checkin her out man.
Brian:
Ok, I was. Now shut up.
Rome:
You shut up. Don't tell me to shut up.
Monica Fuentes:
Both you girlies shut up.
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Stuck on You - A Playful Exchange About Word Games
Walt:
What's a three-letter word for man's best friend?
April:
Tit?
Walt:
No, I've tried that already.
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Stuck on You - A Playful Exchange About Appearance
April: [after surgery to separate the twins]
Bob, you look good.
Walt:
He looks good. What am I, chopped liver?
April:
Actually, yeah.
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Stuck on You - A Curious Inquiry and a Surprising Answer
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Stuck on You - Shared Organs and Their Importance
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Hitch - Misunderstandings in a Speed Dating Encounter
Sara:
Why don't you go hit a titty bar with your buddy, Vance?
Hitch:
...Wow, I don't believe this... That's your source?
Sara:
You buried yourself, Alex.
Hitch:
Then you weren't listening.
Sara:
I heard every word. You're a scam artist. You trick women into getting...
Hitch:
... Into getting out of their own way so great guys like Albert Brennaman have a fighting chance.
Speed Dating Host:
Ok...
Hitch: [gestures at speed-dating scene]
No, no, I want -— I want everybody to take a look at this right now! Because this — this right here — this is exactly why falling in love is so goddamn hard!
Speed Dating Host:
Sir, let's go. Now.
Hitch: [while leaving]
And Vance Munson is a pig! And I refused to work with him. You need to get your facts right. It's because of jerks like him that I even have a job! Had a job.
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Hitch - Confrontation Over Understanding the Truth
Sara:
My job is to try to find the truth!
Hitch:
The truth?! You wouldn't know the truth if it kicked you in the head!
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Hitch - Understanding Signals in Romantic Encounters
Hitch:
Now, on the one hand, it is very difficult for a man to even speak to someone who looks like you. But, on the other hand, should that be your problem?
Sara:
So life's kind of hard all around.
Hitch:
Not if you pay attention. I mean, you're sending all the right signals - no earrings, heels under two inches, your hair is pulled back, you're wearing reading glasses with no book, drinking a Grey Goose martini, which means you had a hell of a week and a beer just wouldn't do it. And if that wasn't clear enough, there's always the "fuck off" that you have stamped on your forehead. because who is going to believe there is a man out there that can sit down beside a woman he doesn't know and genuinely be interested in who she is, what she does, without his own personal agenda?
Sara:
Yeah, I wouldn't even know what that would look like. So what would a guy like that say?
Hitch:
Well, he'd say, "My name is Alex Hitchens and I'm a consultant," but she wouldn't be interested in that because she would be just counting the seconds until he left...
Sara:
... Thinking he was like every other guy...
Hitch:
... Which life experience has taught her is a virtual certainty... but then he'd ask her name, and what she did for a living and she might blow him off, or she might say... ?
Sara:
I'm Sara Melas and I run the gossip column at The Standard." Then he would ask all these penetrating questions about it because he's sincerely, if atypically, interested...
Hitch:
No.
Sara:
No?
Hitch:
He'd be interested... but he would see that there was no way of possibly making her realize, that he was for real.
Sara:
Ah...He could be funny, and charming, and refreshingly original.
Hitch:
Wouldn't help.
Sara:
Don't ya hate it when that happens?
Hitch:
Not really... they'd probably both lead the lives they were headed toward, and my guess is... they'd do just fine. It's a pleasure to have met you, Sara Melas.
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Hitch - Introduction of Chip's Name
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Hitch - Cynicism and Realism in Relationships
Max:
Spoken like a true cynic. Evan was here
Sara:
I'm not a cynic, I'm a realist!
Max: [to the room]
Or a realist masquerading as a cynic who is secretly an optimist. What are you doing here? What is she doing here?
Sara:
SHE works here, remember?!
Max:
No, she doesn't. Not for another four days. Go home.
Sara:
Well, this couldn't wait.
Max:
Of course it could... what are you doing? Go back to the beach, I don't want you here.
Sara:
No, really, you do.
Max:
You are becoming a sick workaholic lunatic.. and this is exactly the kind of nervous overwrought behavior that leads to...
Sara:
... Pictures of Sebby with a busty brunette.
Max:
... A very, very big raise.
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