Frank Albertson Quotes

June Lawrence He's a genius in his line.

Mark Adams Maybe, but I'll bet he spent his childhood stickin pins into butterflies.

Leo Davis Well, if you fellows don't mind, I'm going to wash up.

Harry Binelli Yeah, go ahead. The rest of us are already washed up.

Harry Binelli Hurry up, before they come back. And, groan, groan, stagger about and don't die too soon! You must take your time. And you mustn't die before 11 o'clock.

Leo Davis Don't you worry! I'll give you the best performance you ever saw in a hotel bedroom!

Gordon Miller That's the spirit! Good luck, Davis. Drop dead!

Tom Cassidy You know what I do about unhappiness? I buy it off. Are, uh, are you unhappy? Now, that's, that's not buying happiness. That's just buying off unhappiness. I never carry more than I can afford to lose.

Hardware store customer So far of those I've used, I haven't had much luck with any of them. Well, let's see what they say about this one. They tell you what it's ingredients are, and how it's guaranteed to exterminate every insect in the world, but they do not tell you whether or not it's painless. And I say, insect or man, death should always be painless.

Leo Davis Oh, but you see, I've left home for good. I've burned my bridges behind me.

Gordon Miller I see. But you could go back if you wanted to.

Leo Davis My mother seemed very happy when I left.

Gordon Miller Only a mother's mask. At this moment, she may be sitting at the fireside, wringing her hands.

Leo Davis Oh, we have no fireside.

Gordon Miller You have no fireside? How do you listen to the President's speeches?

Leo Davis You've been in jail?

Harry Binelli Sure, it's'a not so bad. You behave and they make you a trustee.