Memorable Quotes from Gillian Barber
1 quotePlanning a Bed-and-Breakfast in Town
Mrs. Thomas
I think a bed-and-breakfast is just what this town needs.
Aunt Nora
Well, it's pretty hard to pass up, especially full of furniture. Oh, boy! I keep forgetting how big this place is. Judy, Peter, come look at this. I'm gonna put a reception area over here. And a bar over here in the parlor.
Mrs. Thomas
That sounds lovely. I'm sure you and your kids are gonna be very happy here.
Aunt Nora
Oh. Well, actually, they're my late brother's. He and his wife passed away just last winter. Is this something, or what?
Judy Shepherd
It sure is.
Mrs. Thomas
So, what do you think, young man? Is it big enough for you?
Judy Shepherd
Peter hasn't spoken a word since it happened.
Mrs. Thomas
Oh, my. I'm so sorry. How terribly awful.
Judy Shepherd
It's okay. We barely even knew our parents. They were always away-- skiing in Saint Moritz, gambling in Monte Carlo, safariing in darkest Africa. We didn't even know if they loved us. But when the sheik's yacht went down, well, they managed to write us a really beautiful good-bye note that was found floating in a champagne bottle amongst the debris. Excuse me.
[laughing, shaking her head and walking away as she knowingly told Mrs. Thomas a lie]
Aunt Nora
They were very devoted parents. It was a car crash in Canada. So you'll send me those escrow papers?
Mrs. Thomas
First thing tomorrow.
Aunt Nora
I'll have to get a locksmith out for this one. Peter, pick up your toys, please. Peter, take this suitcase up to the attic. Then we can all have ice cream…and bourbon.
[trying to unlock Alan’s room]
Aunt Nora
What? What is it?
Judy Shepherd
I'm going to Motel 6.
Aunt Nora
Oh, for heaven's sake.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.