Memorable Quotes from Greg Kinnear
32 quotesConfronting the Depths of Human Flaws
Simon Bishop
Lucky for you, you're here for rock bottom. You absolute horror of a human being.
[to Melvin Udall]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Father's Plea for His Son
Todd Burpo
Don't you take my son!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Career Risks and Surprising Decisions
Morty O'Reilly
If you do this, you're committing career suicide.
Walt
That's what they said when Erik Estrada quit "CHiPS".
Morty O'Reilly
You're shitting me. He quit?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Exchange on Word Definitions
Walt
What's a four-letter word for snatch?
Bob
Grab.
Walt
Oh... right. Whoopsie.
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A Night of Indulgence and Reflection
Walt
Boozing with ]... boozing with ]...
[[Cher; [Cher]
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The Search for Understanding Heaven's Reality
Todd Burpo
Is heaven a hope? Or as real as the earth and sky? I once asked my grandfather that question. And he said by the time he knew the answer, it would be too late for him to tell me. The day would come when I asked that question again, staring into the eyes of my son.
[first lines of the movie]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Appreciating Beauty Through Time
Simon Bishop
But you're beautiful, Carol. Your skin, your long neck, the back, the line of you. You're why caveman chiseled on walls.
[to Carol Connelly]
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The Humanity Found in Observation
Simon Bishop
Okay. Wh - What I do is I watch. You ever watch somebody who doesn't know that you're watching them? An old woman sitting on a bus or kids going to school or somebody just waiting, and you see this flash come over them, and you know immediately that it has nothing to do with anything external because that hasn't changed. And when you see it, they're just sort of realer, and they're more alive. I mean, you look at someone long enough, you discover their humanity.
[to Vincent Lopiano]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Exchange About Word Games
Walt
What's a three-letter word for man's best friend?
April
Tit?
Walt
No, I've tried that already.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Curious Inquiry and a Surprising Answer
April
Can I ask you a personal question?
Walt
Nine inches.
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Unexpected Responses in a Friendship
Walt
She'll be back. Where else is she gonna find a guy like you?
Bob
I don't know. Chernobyl?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstanding About a Dog's Identity
Simon Bishop
Have you seen Verdell?
Melvin Udall
What does he look like?
Simon Bishop
My dog. You know, my dog with the adorable face? Don't you know what my dog looks like?
Melvin Udall
Oh, I got it. You were talking about your dog. I thought it was the name of that colored man I've been seeing in the halls.
Simon Bishop
Which color was that?
Melvin Udall
Uh . . . like thick molasses, with a broad nose. Perfect for smelling trouble and prison food.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Challenges of Sharing Space
Walt
Think about it. You'll be able to read a book alone, play golf by yourself, masturbate in private like the good Lord intended.
[whispering]
Bob
What are you talking about?
Walt
Oh, please. Last night, it was like trying to sleep next to a paint-shaker.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Decline of Productivity and Civilization
Frank Navasky
Listen to this -- the entire workforce of the state of Virginia had to have solitaire removed from their computers -- because they hadn't done any work in six weeks.… You know what this is, you know what we're seeing here? We're seeing the end of Western civilization as we know it.
[to Kathleen Kelly]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation and Identity in Simon Bishop's Words
Simon Bishop
Do you miss the tough guy? Well here I am, sweetheart! Happy to see me, ya little piss-ant mop!? How bout another ride down the chute?!
[to Verdell; imitating Melvin]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Aging and Relationships Among Friends
Walt
Christ, Bob, you haven't been laid in five years.
Bob
Hey, how you know? Damn.
[Walt gives him a serious look]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Family Moment at a Scenic View
Todd Burpo
Well, I thought that went well, huh? Nice view.
Sonja Burpo
Mmm... I love being up so high.
[Colton suddenly interrupts them by turning on a fire siren]
Todd Burpo
Colton! Hey! I thought I asked you to stop playing with that!
Colton Burpo
I'm sorry, Dad!
[turns off the siren]
Cassie Burpo
I told him not to, Dad!
Sonja Burpo
Half the church wants to stop feeling and start thinking. And the other half, they want the exact opposite.
Todd Burpo
This is Todd. Yeah. Let me call you back. That was the newspaper. They want to do an article about heaven.
[picks up the ringing cell phone; Colton sets off a fire truck horn; hangs up]
Sonja Burpo
And?
Todd Burpo
And they want to interview Colton.
Sonja Burpo
And you think that's a good idea?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Struggle with Loss and Despair
Simon Bishop
Is this fun for you? Hm? You lucky devil. It just keeps getting better and better, don't it? I'm losing my apartment, Melvin. And... and Frank, he wants me to beg my parents, who haven't called me for help. And I won't. And... I... I don't want to paint anymore. So, the life that I was trying for is over. The life that I had is gone, and I'm feeling so damn sorry for myself that it's difficult to breathe. It's high times for you, isn't it, Melvin?! The gay neighbor's terrified! TERRIFIED!
[to Melvin Udall]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Humanitarian Award Discussion Between Friends
Walt
Are you kidding? You could win a humanitarian award for how nice you were to us.
Cher
Aww... no. Well, really, is there talk of me getting one?
Walt
No, no, it's just a figure of speech.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Exchange About Appearance
April
Bob, you look good.
[after surgery to separate the twins]
Walt
He looks good. What am I, chopped liver?
April
Actually, yeah.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Warning About Mace Usage
Walt
She's got mace.
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Resilience Amidst Commercial Challenges
Frank Navasky
You are a lone reed, standing tall, waving boldly, in the corrupt sands of commerce.
[to Kathleen Kelly, typing]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Critique of Modern Technology and Media
Frank Navasky
Technologically speaking, the world's out of hand. Take the VCR. The whole idea of a VCR is that it makes it possible for you to tape what's on television while you're out of the house. But the whole point of being out of the house is so you can miss what's on television. Radio. Now there's a medium I can get behind.
[to Sidney-Ann Strongin on television]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Importance of War Justifications
Miller
When you peddled that shit in DC, did they know it was a lie? Or did they just never bother to ask?
Clark Poundstone
Okay, okay. Come on, none of this matters anymore. WMD? This doesn't matter.
Miller
What the fuck you talking about? Of course it fucking matters! The reasons we go to war always matter! It's all that matters! It fucking matters!
[grabs Poundstone angrily and forcefully]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Reflection on Love and Connection
Simon Bishop
You don't love anything, Mr. Udall.
[to Melvin Udall]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Free Burgers and Friendly Banter
Walt
All right. Burgers on the house!
Bob
He's just kiddin', you cheap bastards.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussing Finances Amidst Romantic Sentiments
Todd Burpo
When Jay offered us a house as a part of my salary, he never mentioned the railroad.
Sonja Burpo
I like the rumble. It's romantic.
Todd Burpo
How tight are we this month?
Sonja Burpo
No, don't talk about money.
Todd Burpo
Slim Forrest couldn't pay for those garage doors. He donated some carpet for the church instead.
Sonja Burpo
But he said he had the cash when he placed the order.
Todd Burpo
Um... Things changed.
Sonja Burpo
You had a rough day, didn't you?
Todd Burpo
As long as I'm with you, I'm not afraid.
Sonja Burpo
You're good, but let me tell you something. The next time I'm practicing your favorite hymn and you howl like a dog, I'm going to whip you like a dog. Do you hear me?
Todd Burpo
Doesn't sound so bad.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Gratitude in Everyday Interactions
Frank Navasky
Thank your.
[to Sidney-Ann Strongin on television]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Olympia Report and Gunshot Reference
Frank Navasky
The Olympia Report deluxe Electric. Report…as in gunshot.
[to Kathleen Kelly]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Harsh Rejection of Melvin's Actions
Simon Bishop
Rot in hell, Melvin.
[to Melvin Udall]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Designated Walker Chooses Sobriety Over Drinks
Walt
Hey, Dave. How about another tall one?
Dave
Got it. How about you there, Bob?
Bob
No, no. No, I'm cool. I'm the designated walker tonight.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Casual Conversation Between Friends About Family
Jay Wilkins
How are you doing, buddy?
Todd Burpo
Good. How are you?
Jay Wilkins
How's that Colton doing today? Is he back to torturing his sister?
Todd Burpo
Yes. I need some advice, smart advice.
Jay Wilkins
Well, I am not smart, so you came to the right guy.
Todd Burpo
I know that.
Jay Wilkins
Nothing but clumsy, inaccurate advice available here. I've been expecting to see you a little sooner.
Todd Burpo
What do you mean?
Jay Wilkins
Well, I'm your banker.
Todd Burpo
I didn't come here for a loan.
Jay Wilkins
Not the bank's money, just from a friend to a friend. Let me help you out, okay? Nobody would have to know.
Todd Burpo
I'd know. I never wanted to be the guy who stands up there in the pulpit asking people to give to charity when all he does is take it.
Jay Wilkins
It's not charity. It's a loan from a friend to a friend. I know you need the help. It's what real people do.
Todd Burpo
I don't.
Jay Wilkins
Well, then you didn't come here for smart advice. I don't think the church has kept your salary in line with the new members that you've brought in. I think you deserve a raise. Let me talk to the board, see what I can do.
Todd Burpo
I didn't come here for a raise, either.
Jay Wilkins
All right, good. I didn't want to ask them. What can I do for you?
Todd Burpo
It's Colton. He's been talking about this, uh... We ask these kids to believe this stuff and I don't even know if I believe it myself, Jay.
Jay Wilkins
What?
[Todd's and Jay's cell phones both ring at once]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.