James Spader Quotes

Mr. Richards Please. Listen, I pride myself on being able to size up a job applicant and see just what kind of executive potential he has. I have just the job for you.

Steff McKee You got a problem, friend?

Dr. Daniel Jackson Here, look at this. It says, "A traveler from distant stars escaped from a dying world, looking for a way to extend his own life. His body decaying and weak, he couldn't prevent his own demise." Apparently his whole species was becoming extinct. So he traveled or searched the galaxies, looking for a way to cheat death. Look here: "He came to a world rich with life, where he encountered a primitive race." Humans, heh. A species which with all his powers and knowledge he'd maintain indefinitely. He realized, within a human body, he had a chance for a new life. Now, apparently he found a young boy. It says, "As the frightened villagers ran, night became day. Curious and without fear, he walked towards the light." Ra took him and possessed his body, like some kind of a... parasite looking for a host. Inhabiting this human form, he appointed himself ruler. He used the Stargate to bring thousands of people here to this planet as workers... for the mines. (...) Now, something happened back on Earth. A rebellion or uprising and the Stargate was buried there. Fearful of a rebellion here, Ra outlawed reading and writing. He didn't want the people to remember the truth...

Mr. Richards What arrogance! That worm of a stock boy has created an affront to the dignity of this store. I'll have it taken down immediately and make sure that lunatic never works in this town again.

Dr. Daniel Jackson Is there a lunch or something...?

Steff McKee A little, lingering doubt perhaps, Blane? You know, you gotta give her credit though. I mean, after you dumped her, she certainly went out and found herself what I'd have to say is probably the most interesting date that our generation...

Dr. Daniel Jackson Well, the translation of the inner track is wrong. Must've used Budge. I don't know why they keep reprinting his books.

Mr. Richards You people that work at night scare me.

Dr. Daniel Jackson (On a recording of his notes about the symbols after two weeks of no progress) I'm never gonna get paid.

Mr. Richards We would all love to know what possessed Switcher to create such a window display. Did you see those crowds gaping on the sidewalks? It's an embarrassment!

Graham Dalton I remember reading somewhere that men learn to love the person that they're attracted to, and that women become more and more attracted to the person that they love.

Dr. Daniel Jackson HEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Dr. Daniel Jackson It's not "Door to Heaven", it's... "STARGATE".

Dr. Daniel Jackson (to Col. O'Neill) I don't want to die. And your men don't want to die, and these people certainly don't want to die. It's a shame you're in such a hurry to.

Steff McKee Well, listen, any girl who did that to me, I would not be too jazzed to hold onto, Blane. It's not worth it, man. I told you it isn't gonna work, you know. This girl was, is, and will always be nada.

Mr. Richards I've put my future in the hands of a vegetable.

Dr. Daniel Jackson It tastes like chicken.. That tastes like

Steff McKee Andie, you're a bitch.

Mr. Richards Well, you must lead a charmed life. It was all I could do to save your skin in there. No thanks are necessary, Switcher!