Jason Robards Quotes

Albert Mr. Burns, you can assume at this point that Miss Markowitz is no longer involved with your case. The Board will be informed that she is no longer involved with this particular case. Her continuing here, to discuss your case -- at this point -- is entirely unofficial. You can dismiss any conference -- that may resume after I leave -- when I leave here, from your mind. And regardless of what you think of me--

Murray I think you're a dirty O.W.

Albert And -- do you know what you are? Maladjusted!

Murray Oooh!

Ben Bradlee You know the results of the latest ]? Half the country never even heard of the word ]. Nobody gives a shit. You guys are probably pretty tired, right? Well, you should be. Go on home, get a nice hot bath. Rest up... 15 minutes. Then get your asses back in gear. We're under a lot of pressure, you know, and you put us there. Nothing's riding on this except the, uh, ], ], and maybe the future of the country. Not that any of that matters, but if you guys fuck up again, I'm gonna get mad. Goodnight.

Sandy There is a kind of relief that it's gone - the job, and even Albert. But I know what it is, it's just irresponsible, that's all. And I don't have the vaguest idea who I am.

Murray It's just that there are all these Sandras running around who you've never met before, and it's confusing at first, fantastic. But damn it, isn't it great to find out how many Sandras there are? It's like those little cars in the circus, you know? This tiny red car comes out, hardly big enough for a midget, and it putters around, and suddenly its doors open and out come a thousand clowns, whooping and hollering and raising hell.

Nick We got to get rid of him!

Murray Nick...

Nick We got to! Please!

Murray Nick, we can't. We can't. Aw, kid, I'm sorry. Sorry, kid. I'm sorry.

Will Halloway If you're a good person, then demons can't harm you, can they? Am I? Am I a good person?

Charles Halloway Well, I wouldn't count on your mother's answer right now, but I think you are.

Dr. Sam Hachiya What did you see? You come from Kansas City. What did you see?

Dr. Russell Oakes I was on the ], about 30 miles away. I'm not sure...it was high in the air, directly above downtown. Like the ]...exploding.

Ben Bradlee Goddammit, when is somebody going to go on the record in this story?!...You guys are about to write a story that says the former Attorney General, the highest-ranking law enforcement officer in this country, is a crook! Just be sure you're right...Leave plenty of room for his denial.

Charles Halloway Three o'clock. They call it the soul's midnight...

Julian French We tried hooking up an auxiliary pump up to a backup generator, and we're still only getting a trickle.

Dr. Sam Hachiya I don't understand. Did they burn out?

Dr. Austin They could have been subject to the ] effects.

Dr. Russell Oakes What's that?

Dr. Austin Electro-Magnetic Pulse." When a large nuclear device is airburst at high altitude, a lot of electrical disruption can be created, principally with ], communication systems, electrical wires, ], ], ]. Of course, it's all theoretical. It's never happened before. In short, very little ].

Dr. Sam Hachiya Forever?

Albert Miss Markowitz did not show up in Queens yesterday.

Murray So...

Albert Well, her parents are quite upset. I am quite upset. Where is she?

Murray She’s hiding in the closet.

Albert Now, we’re really all quite anxious to know where she is.

Murray I’m not kidding, Albert, she’s in the closet.

Albert She is in the closet.

Murray I wouldn’t lie to you, Albert.

Albert Why is she in the closet?

Murray I don’t know, uh…she’s got this thing about closets.

Albert Well, that’s a very silly thing for her to be in, that closet.

Murray Well, don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. Now, what else can I do for you, Albert?

Albert That’s a difficult thing for me to believe...I mean, that she’s right there in the closet. You know, you are not a person, Mr. Burns, you are an experience!

Murray That’s very nice, Albert. I’ll have to remember that.

Albert I was not aware that Nicholas was an O.W. child.

Murray O.W."?

Albert Out of wedlock.

Murray For a moment there, I thought you meant prisoner of war. I think it's that natural warmth of yours, Albert, that leads me to misunderstand.

Charles Halloway Tears, that's what they like! My God, how they like tears! Look, that's no way to save young Jim, Jump around, eh? Whoop and holler, Come on, look at me, eh? Look at me. I'm the great whooping crane. Whoop, whoop, whoop.

Dr. Landowska There is a rumor that they are evacuating Moscow. There are people even leaving Kansas City because of the missile base. Now I ask you: To where does one go from Kansas City? The ]? ]? We are not talking about ] anymore. Hiroshima was... was peanuts!

Dr. Russell Oakes What's going on? Do you have any idea what's going on in this world?

Dr. Landowska Yeah. ]... has a habit of getting its way.

Dr. Russell Oakes I think you've got to be willing to let your baby come whether you like it or not. You're holding back hope.

Alison Ransom Hope for what? What do you think is going to happen out there? You think we're going to sweep up the dead and fill in a couple of holes and build some ]? You think all those people left alive out there are going to say, "Oh, I'm sorry. It wasn't my fault. Let's kiss and make up"? We knew the score. We knew all about bombs, we knew all about fallout. We knew this could happen for forty years. But nobody was interested.

Dr. Russell Oakes I can't argue with you.

Alison Ransom Argue with me. Please... give me a reason. Tell me about hope. Tell me why you work so hard in here.

Dr. Russell Oakes ...I don't know.

Charles Halloway A father should be able to play baseball with his son.

Mrs. Halloway Baseball's not necessary, not with a heart like yours, he'll forgive you that.

Phil Parma When was the last time you talked to your son?

Earl Partridge ...I don't know. Ten, maybe... five... ... that's another thing that goes...

Phil Parma Your memory?

Earl Partridge Time lines, you know? I remember things, but not... right there, you know?

Phil Parma Yeah.

Earl Partridge Yeah". The fuck do you know?

Phil Parma I've seen it before.

Earl Partridge Yeah, other assholes like me.

Phil Parma Oh, there's no asshole like you.

Earl Partridge Cocksucker.

Phil Parma How come every other word you use is either "cocksucker", "shitballs" or "fuck"?

Earl Partridge Do me a personal favor.

Phil Parma Go fuck myself?

Earl Partridge Yeah, you got it.

Murray Nick, you are about to see a horrible, horrible thing.

Nick What's that Murray?

Murray People going to work.

Charles Halloway I, uh, have the honor, sir.

Mr. Dark And have had for many years, I do believe. All that time spent living only through other men's lives. Dreaming only other men's dreams. What a waste.

Charles Halloway Sometimes a man can learn more from other men's dreams than he can from his own. Come visit me, sir, if you wish to improve your education.

Mr. Dark I will, and I may improve yours.

Ben Bradlee Once when I was reporting, ]'s top guy gave me the word they were looking for a successor to ]. I wrote it and the day it appeared Johnson called a press conference and appointed Hoover head of the ] for life... And when he was done, he turned to his top guy and the President said, "Call Ben Bradlee and tell him fuck you." I took a lot of static for that—everyone said, "You did it, Bradlee, you screwed up—you stuck us with Hoover forever." I screwed up but I wasn't wrong. You guys haven't been wrong yet, is that why you're scared shitless? You should be.

Ben Bradlee WOODSTEIN!

Ben Bradlee I can't do the reporting for my reporters, which means I have to trust them. And I hate trusting anybody.

Dr. Russell Oakes I wonder who was spared. I wonder if ], ], ]... are just like Kansas City now.

Charles Halloway For God's sake, go home! The man meeting you here isn't your husband!

Helen Oakes My God. It's 1962 all over again. The ]. Do you remember ] on television, telling ] to turn his boats around?

Dr. Russell Oakes Full retaliatory response." He didn't bat an eye.

Helen Oakes We were in New York, in bed... just like this, remember? 118th street.

Dr. Russell Oakes Meatball sandwiches from Sharky's.

Helen Oakes Your last year's residency. I swear we made Marilyn that night.

Dr. Russell Oakes We got up, and went to the window to look for the bombs.

Helen Oakes It didn't happen. It's not going to happen now.

Dr. Russell Oakes Nah. People are crazy, but not that crazy.

Helen Oakes Well... do you want to know from crazy? The Donnelly's left today for ].

Dr. Russell Oakes Guadalajara?

Helen Oakes I swear it. I spoke to Herb as they were pulling out. He said they were dovetailing their vacation with the rising international tensions.

Dr. Russell Oakes Aw, cut it out!

Helen Oakes I'm not kidding. Well, they took their Vietnamese maid with them. And that rotten little barking dog with the pushed-in face.

Dr. Russell Oakes Oh, what about their little combination tractor/lawnmower/golfcart with the silver hubcaps?

Helen Oakes Probably... What if it does happen? What'll we do?

Ben Bradlee really said that about ]? Cross out the words "her tit" and run it...this is a family newspaper.

Joe Huxley Hello? Hello, is anybody there? Is anybody there? This is Lawrence. This is Lawrence, Kansas, is anybody there? This is Joe Huxley, I'm broadcasting out of the science building at the University of Kansas, is anybody there? I...have an atmosphere report for whoever's listening. Dr. Oakes...do you read? Come in, Dr. Oakes, do you hear me?

Dr. Russell Oakes Yes, Joe.

Joe Huxley We're holding fast at just a hair under...uh...fifty rads per hour. I thought that it would have diminished by now. I...I guess that means we're picking up a lot of fallout from...Titan missile bases in Wichita and wherever else...out west...that's way the wind blows. Straight towards St. Louis.

Dr. Russell Oakes Uh-huh. When will it be safe to move people to other buildings?

Joe Huxley ...it'll never be safe.

Dr. Russell Oakes Come on, Joe.

Joe Huxley ...wait till it gets down to under two rads an hour...if and when. You picked up anybody else on uh...on your end...?

Dr. Russell Oakes Not a soul...

Joe Huxley This is Lawrence. This is Lawrence, Kansas, is anybody there? Anybody at all...?

Charles Halloway Boys, what the hell is going on around here?

Charles Halloway By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes.

Mr. Dark Then rang the bells both loud and deep. God is not dead nor doth he sleep.

Charles Halloway The wrong will fail, the right prevail, with peace on Earth, goodwill to men.

Mr. Dark It's a thousand years to Christmas, Mr. Holloway.

Charles Halloway You're wrong. It's here, in this library tonight, and can't be spoiled.

Mr. Dark Did Will and Jim bring it with them on the soles of their shoes? Then, we shall have to scrape them.

Ben Bradlee Now hold it, hold it. We're about to accuse Mr. Haldeman, who only happens to be the second most important man in America, of conducting a criminal conspiracy from inside the White House. It would be nice if we were right.

Earl Partridge I loved her so. She knew what I did, she knew all the fucking stupid things I’d done. But the ] was stronger of anything you can think of. The goddamn regret. THE GODDAMN REGRET! And I’ll die, now I’ll die and I’ll tell you what. The biggest regret of my ], I let my ] go. What did I do? I’m sixty-five years old, and I’m ]. Million years ago, the fucking regret and guilt, these things... don’t ever let anyone ever say to you, you shouldn’t regret anything. Don’t do that, don't! You regret what you fucking want, use that, use that, use that regret for anything, any way you want, you can use it, OK? Oh, ]. This is a long way to go with no punch. A little moral, story I say: Love...Love...Love. This fucking life, it’s so fucking hard. So long, Life ain’t short it’s long, it’s long. God damn it! God damn, what did I do? What did I do? What did I do?

Charles Halloway We gotta stop blaming sometime.

Charles Halloway I know who you are. You are the autumn people. Where do you come from? The dust. Where do you go to? The grave.

Mr. Dark Yes. We are the hungry ones. Your torments call us like dogs in the night. And we do feed, and feed well.

Charles Halloway To stuff yourselves on other people's nightmares.

Mr. Dark And butter our plain bread with delicious pain. So, you do understand a little.

Charles Halloway You are known in this town. My father knew you.

Mr. Dark Your father? The preacher? That half-man?

Charles Halloway He lived on goodness.

Mr. Dark Tasteless fare. Funerals, bad marriages, lost loves, lonely beds. That is our diet. We suck that misery and find it sweet. We search for more always. We can smell young boys ulcerating to be men a thousand miles off. And hear a middle-aged fool like yourself groaning with midnight despairs from halfway around the world.