Memorable Quotes from Jim Rash
2 quotesUnexpected Announcements and Personal Revelations
Owen
Please report to the Administrative Offices International. Duncan, please report to the Administrative Offices International. I have to announce it over the PA as my voice won't carry that far. My throat suffered major damage during an intense make-out session with Lewis mom. She has a forked tongue and a touch of the herpes.
[over the PA system, as Duncan is talking to Susanna]
Lewis
I don't have a mom. I have two dads. In your face.
[annoyed]
Owen
Hurry, hurry.
Duncan
Hold on a second.
[to Susanna]
Owen
Please. Hurry up. This is pressing, pressing. Urgent. I can't tell you how pressing. You can't fathom how pressing. How's it going? What's up? Did you need something?
[over the PA system; to Duncan]
Duncan
No.
Owen
Who's that, big guy?
Duncan
Just a girl.
Roddy
You stallion, you!
Duncan
I don't know. She's older than me.
Roddy
So... what are you doing over here talking to us and not over there, sealing the deal with that cougar?
Duncan
Well, maybe, Roddy, if you guys hadn't called me over here...
[smiles]
Owen, Roddy
Oooo!
[chuckle]
Owen
Return to your lady friend. Duncan, please return to your lady friend. Please let her know that this conversation was entirely about her. In other news, this is very awkward for you.
[over the PA system]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Conflict Over Seating Arrangement in Class
Ethan
He's in my seat.
Head T.A. Philip
Yeah... and we're grown-ups. We don't argue over seats. Now go sit over there. There are plenty of empty seats there.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.