John Getz Quotes

Abby He's real careful. Fact is, he's anal.

Ray Huh?

Abby Yeah, he told me once himself. He said to me... "In here, Abby. In here... I'm anal.

Ray Well I'll be damned.

Abby I couldn't believe it either. Me on the other hand, I got lots of personality. Marty always said I had too much. Course he was never big on personality. He sent me to a psychiatrist to see if he could calm me down some.

Ray Yeah? What happened?

Abby Psychiatrist said I was the healthiest person he'd ever met, so Marty fired him.

Ray Is Marty here?

Meurice Not here tonight. Wasn't here last night. He's especially not back in his office.

Ray Thanks, Meurice.

Meurice For what?

Meurice Howdy stranger.

Ray Meurice. Sorry I didn't show last night.

Meurice Wasn't too busy. You missed a good one, though. This white guy walks in about one o'clock, asks if we have a discount for alcoholics... I tell him to get lost, but Marty's sitting here listening and I can tell he's thinking that maybe it ain't such a bad idea.

Teenager Hey mister, how'd you break your pussyfinger?

Strip joint DJ And remember, gentlemen, we're always here, two to two, A.M. to P.M., three hundred and sixty-four days and Christmas, God willing and the creek don't rise.

Ray You left your weapon behind.

Ray Why d'you wanna leave all this?

Abby You kidding? I don't wanna leave all this, I just wanna leave Marty.

Ray Am I fired? You wanna hit me? What?

Marty I don't particularly want to talk to you.

Ray Well... if you're not gonna fire me I might as well quit.

Marty Fine. Suit yourself...Having a good time?

Ray I don't like this kind of talk.

Marty Then what'd you come here for?

Ray You owe me for two weeks.

Marty Nope. She's an expensive piece of ass...You get a refund though, if you tell me who else she's been sluicing.

Ray I want that money. If you wanna tell me something, fine--

Marty What're you, a fucking marriage counselor?

Marty What're you smiling at--I'm a funny guy, right, I'm an asshole? No, no, that's not what's funny. What's funny is her. What's funny is that I had you two followed because, if it isn't you, she's been sleeping with someone else...What's really going to be funny is when she gives you that innocent look and says, "What're you talking about, Ray, I haven't done anything funny." ...But the funniest thing to me right now is that you think she came back here for you--that's what's funny...Come on this property again and I'll be forced to shoot you...Fair notice.

Gus By the end of lunch we'll probably be sharing our intimate histories, stories of our first time. Next thing you know we'll be sharing a cigarette in post-coital bliss.

Sue Ellen Are you talking about us having sex?

Gus Hey, hold on, slow down, you're moving too fast for me! But if that's an area you're interested in, it can be arranged. And if it doesn't, I was kidding.

Abby He gave me a little pearl-handled .38 for out first anniversary.

Ray Uh-huh.

Abby Figured I'd better leave before I used it on him. I don't know how you can stand him.

Ray Well, I'm only an employee, I ain't married to him.

Gus Now are you gonna believe me or are you gonna believe some kid?

Rose I'm gonna believe some kid, go to hell Gus.

Abby I said, "Marty, how come you're anal and I gotta go to the psychiatrist?

Ray What'd he say?

Abby Nothing. He's like you, he doesn't say much.

Ray Thanks.

Abby Except when he doesn't say things, they're usually nasty.

Ray Mm-hmm.

Abby When you don't, they're usually nice.

Abby I don't know. Sometimes I think there's something wrong with him. Like maybe he's sick? Mentally?...Or is it maybe me, do you think?

Ray Listen, I ain't a marriage counselor. I don't know what goes on, I don't wanna know... But I like you. I always liked you...

Ray Hello.

Marty Having a good time?

Ray What? Who is this?

Marty I don't know, who's this? You still there?

Ray Yeah, I'm still here.

Abby Ray?

Ray Yeah.

Abby What was that?

Ray Your husband.