Justin LongQuotes

Paul Saunders: Bad break, Nick!

Paul Saunders: That stuff's strong, so only take two.

Bartleby Gaines: [[Albert Einstein; [w:Pocahontas|Pocahontas; [Corey Feldman; [Corey Haim; [w:Lewis and Clark Expedition|Lewis and Clark; [w:Suzanne Somers|Suzanne Somers; [Bono] Listen guys, there are plenty of successful people who didn't go to college. ]. You know? ] never went to college. ] and ]; they had a great run. Both ]. ]. ].

Wallace Bryton: How far is Bifrost from here?

Girl Clerk #1: [in a Canadian accent] It's aboot two hours from here.

Wallace Bryton: [laughing] It's "aboot" two hours away.

Girl Clerk #2: I hate American guys.

Border Agent: When you're visiting the Great White North of Canada, you got your Canado's and your Canadon'ts. Right there, top shelf, number one: don't go tellin a Canadian you don't follow hockey.

Wallace Bryton: Of course. I should have known that. It makes them sad, right?

Border Agent: Canadians don't get sad. Sadness was made by the USA.

Wallace Bryton: Oh, c'mon, what does that mean?

Border Agent: Take off, it's true! Right there, on our flag. It's right there when you look at it, and you see past that sacred maple leaf, you know what you see?

Wallace Bryton: A white wall.

Border Agent: You see that, in America, you're red white and blue, but in Canada, you're red, white, but never blue, eh? Ever.

Wallace Bryton: Gotcha. That's actually... I never thought of it that way before. I just thought of Canadians as, you know... nice.

Border Agent: Well, that right there is another Canadon't. We're not nice, we're optimistic. There's a difference.

Wallace Bryton: I'm so scared. This guy wants to turn me into an animal or something...

Wallace Bryton: [[Canada] I don't wanna die in ]!

Zack Brown: Brandon here is the star of such adult films as...what was that one called again?

Brandon St. Randy: You Better Shut Your Mouth or I'm Gonna Fuck It.

Zack Brown: Oh, yeah... surprised I forgot that.

Matt Farrell: That's her!

John McClane: Her" who?

Agent Johnson: What're you talking about?

Matt Farrell: It's them.

John McClane: Are you saying it's "them" them?

Matt Farrell: [McClane picks up his handset] I swear to you, I know her! I would know her voice anywhere! Don't say anything! Don't...

John McClane: [speaks into the radio. Mai, along with Gabriel and several other henchmen, listen in] Just keep your mouth shut for a minute. Hey, Metro, how's your day going over there? Gotta be pretty, uh, crazy over there, what with all those 587s, huh?

Mai Linh: Yes sir; we've had to dispatch all units.

John McClane: Yeah, you had to dispatch all units for all the naked people walking around? Cut the bullshit, honey, just put your boss on.

Thomas Gabriel: [over radio] Officer McClane.

John McClane: [Trey begins pulling up information on McClane on his computers] It's Detective McClane, asshole. Don't worry, though, we're gonna have plenty of time to get to know each other when I come visit you in prison.

Thomas Gabriel: [looks at Holly Gennaro-McClane's license plate and other personal details; reads McClane's pension fund; presses a button that wipes out McClane's 401k] But, John, I already know so much about you: your address in Brooklyn; payments on your mortgage; how long you've been a member of the NYPD; and how's Holly? Well that's sad - you're divorced. Was that tough on little Jack and Lucy? Now this is sad: after 30 years I'd have thought you'd have a better pension plan than what I see here. Oh, and it gets worse: your 401k no longer exists! Tell you what, let me make it up to you: shoot Mr. Farrell in the head and drive away, and by the time you reach the end of the next block, all your debts will be wiped clean, and your children will be set for life.