Elf - Elves and Their Unique Jobs
Papa Elf:
Oh, hello. You're, uh, you're probably here. About the, uh, the story. Elves love to tell stories. I-I'll bet you didn't know that about elves. There's, uh, probably a lot of things You... you didn't know about elves. Another... another interesting, uh, elf-ism, uh, there are only three jobs available to an elf. The first is making shoes at night, while, you know, while the old... the old cobbler sleeps.
Shoe elf:
Lazy bum. Couldn't even make a clog.
Papa Elf: [''Scene cuts to an [[w:Tree house|oak tree house]
] scene] You can bake cookies in a tree.
Elf:
Hey!
Papa Elf: [[w:Keebler Company|dangerous having an oven in an oak tree during the dry season.]
As you can imagine, it's, uh, ]
Baker elf: [''Scene of elves fleeing an oak tree going up in flames'']
I wanna make shoes!
Papa Elf: [''scene cuts to the workshop scene''; [w:Santa's workshop|Santa's workshop]
But the third job... uh, some call it, uh, "The show," or... or "the big dance," it's the profession that every elf aspires to, and that is to build toys in ].
Supervisor Elf:
Only two weeks left till Christmas!
Papa Elf: [[w:gnomes|gnomes; [w:trolls|trolls; ''scene of gnome belches''; ''Troll in diaper farts'']
It's a job only an elf can do. Our... our nimble fingers, natural cheer, and active minds are perfect for toy-building. They... they tried using ] and ], But the gnomes drank too much... and the trolls weren't toilet trained. No human being has ever set... set foot in Santa's workshop. Uh, that is until about 30 years ago, and, as you may have guessed, that's where our story begins.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.